))) }i{ Dictations of My}i{((( Soul #1
Emotions (and poems that summon stronger emotions):
Infinite Sadness
____________________
Reaching down,
eating away,
piercing my soul,
echoing throughout
my hollow body.
It hurts.
It kills.
It penetrates.
It weathers away
my protective barrier.
It seeps through the cracks
in my walls.
It floods through me,
like a raging river,
and it leaks out
in salty little droplets
that trail down my face.
Acute Despair
__________________
Hurt, shame, and
stabbing knives.
Confusion and anger.
Sadness.
"Nooooooo!"
Cries from within my soul,
but not a word finds it's way through my lips.
My spirit convulses with disgust.
Dirty, used.
Oh, so confused!
Help.
Indifference
_________________
Numb, I stare through people.
I go through all of the right motions, and
I act as they expect -
maybe colder.
I deal with my problems internally.
I hide my feelings under a rock.
I shock people with my insensitivity,
and that hurts me too.
I learn to disguise my indifference,
but I am still empty.
I care nothing for myself.
Things matter, but seem dreamlike.
I try to forget and move on,
but, no, my rock is in the way.
I don't care enough to move it,
so it rests there.
Maybe someday it will roll away.
Faith
__________
Barricaded doors
Dirty windows
Aching soul
Eyes blind to affection
Worn carpets
Stained sinks
Tired feet
Disillusioned heart
Tattered, soiled, and weary
My body is God's temple,
I stumble on.
Oblivion
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I waver on the brink,
staring straight into his eyes.
Unfaltering, my eyes locked in his,
I let myself lean into
Darkness.
My eyes fuzz over and
My senses are dulled.
Obsolete, nothing......
Delicious nothingness.
Enveloping, peaceful darkness.
What's that noise?
Disturbed, my eyes open and strain to focus.
It isn't so peaceful anymore,
it's more scary.
I don't want to close my eyes again.
I don't want to return,
yet, I feel his hard stare piercing my body.
Grimacing, I begin to turn my head away.
Teetering. oh so unstable.
It's scary to be here.
I try to remember how I even found this place.
It's no use.
My memory is too cluttered to sort out.
It's all too much trouble.
I just want to drift, to float.
My eyes fall shut.
I can no longer tell whether I closed them,
or if I just couldn't hold them up anymore.
Teetering, I fall into oblivion.
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