In Loving Memory of Stillborn 10/3/96
This page is dedicated to our daughter Marissa who was stillborn on October 3, 1996. Following is the story of Marissa's death and then birth. At the end you will find links to pictures of our angel as well as pregnancy loss and grief support links. Except for getting sick several times a day for all 29 weeks, I had a picture perfect pregnancy. One day as I was sitting at my computer surfing the net, my eyes got a little blurry. I found this happens to me when I'm tired, so I brushed it off. A little later I developed a headache so I laid down and shut my eyes. The headache went away and my husband, Pat, arrived home shortly afterward. Marissa kicked me the whole time I was resting and I actually saw an outline of her tiny foot for the first time. I was so excited! An hour or so later my headache came back really bad and I noticed that I had a fever of 101.5. Then my vision started to get blurry. I had Pat call my ob's answering service. By the time she called back, just minutes later, I was extremely nauseous and dizzy and Marissa was kicking furiously. At the time I didn't know it, but she was saying good-bye. The ob asked me to meet her at the emergency room. I hung up the phone and decided I needed to throw up before I left for the hospital. I never made it to the bathroom. I had a seizure in the hallway and luckily Pat caught me as I was falling. He called 911 and when the emt's picked me up my blood pressure was 220/?. I was barely aware of what was going on around me because I kept slipping in and out of consciousness. The next thing I remember is the ob introducing herself. There were 12 ob's in the practice I was going to and I had only met a few of them. I blacked out again and only awakened long enough to hear her confirm that Marissa had died from the seizure. I hadn't even felt them put all the IV's in. About an hour later I regained consciousness long enough to figure out what was going on. The ob came in and told me she had to induce labor in order to relieve the eclampsia. About that time I felt my first and last contraction. I asked Pat to call our parents and my best friend and then promptly blacked out again.. The next time I woke up I found out that the magnesium they were using to avoid seizures was relaxing my contractions. We were going to have to wait until I stabilized and do a c-section. I don't remember getting the epidural or going in for the c-section. I just remember bits and pieces of pictures being taken afterward and remember that she was perfect and I had touched her tiny little fingers. When I woke up again I was much more alert. I heard a little one running out in the hall and called him into my room. I just needed to see a baby. Well, the nurses couldn't believe I did this. The next afternoon, one of the obs from my practice stuck her head in and said, "You are one sick young lady", and then left. I was so confused, after all, delivery was the cure for what I had, and I had delivered. Pat explained everything to me. I had severe eclampsia, was in maternity ICU, and it was going to take a while for me to get better.. Everyone was wonderful to me. One of the nurses told me she cried when she saw how much Pat loves me. In the days to come, we had a grave side funeral service. We cried a lot and we went to visit Marissa every day. We are forever grateful for the support of our family, friends, and church. While we still feel the pain of losing a child, Allie & Shelby have healed many wounds.
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