And thou shalt eat the bread
of thine own baking and
thou shalt dwell forever in a
dity house if thou dost not choose
to clean it thyself.

Thou shalt go and find thy
offspring prostrate on their cots.
And thou shalt say unto them , "Haste,
arise and shine, for I have many labors
for thee to perform, therefore I have
many hours already preparing the way."

And thine offspring shalt linger in sleep
and shalt say unto thee, Thou didst not
watch the late, late late show
as I did last night and mine eyes are
heavy and mine bones acheth."

And thou shalt say unto thy offspring,
"Get thee up from thy cot
Ere I lay my hand upon thee,
and go ye hither and scrub a sparkling
tub, for thou hast left black rings
upon it's sides."

And thy offspring shall say unto thee,
"I will go and do thy bidding in a minute."
And thy rage shall know no end,
And thou shalt weep and wail
And gnash thy teeth mightily.

Nevertheless thou shalt scrub
a sparkling tub thyself and glory
shall be added upon thee, for thou
didst not strike the lazy beast.

Thou art blessed above all others
and thy descendants shall call thee
blessed, for thou preparest a table
before them. Thou cookest meat and
all manner of tasty vitttles and they
shall sit at the table with thee and
partake with thee.

And they shall add glory to thy crown
for thy shall let thee also wash
the dishes, if thou wilt. And when
the night falleth, thou shalt be weary,
and thy offspring shall say of thee,
"She is an old woman therefore she
neither goes out dancing, nor does she
watch the late, late, late show."

Thy art and thy craft shall make thee called on,
and thou shalt labor at many tasks in the kingdom
for whosoever askth, thou do his bidding.

Thy back shall acheth with arthritis
Thy cane and thy husband shall be thy
support. Thy veins shall be varicose veins
in thine aching legs, but thou shalt do
thy labor with a smile, neither shall thou
gripe, for in the day that thou dost, thy
name shall be mud.

Nevertheless, thou shalt be blessed above
all others for thou art Mother, and
thou shalt find peace and joy in thy
offspring forever and ever, if thou
endureth to the end.

As if the world is not complicated enough
in our "real lives",with our jobs,
family and day to day affairs.
Some of us choose to lose ourselves in cyberspace,
which by most accounts, for many of us is bordering
on insanity.

We spend hours on line,telling strangers personal
things you would not normally talk about.
We make new friends,lose old friends.
Hypnotized by a 14 inch diagonal screen,
we enter into a fantasy world,
where the grass is always greener on the other side.

We fall in love, fall out of love,
we look to total strangers for "approval".
We take chances we normally wouldn't take.
We open our souls to strangers,
people,that by most accounts couldn't give a rats ass
if we fell into a hole and dissappeared.

Yet there is still hope,there are a few people out
here in cyberspace,who have a genuine heart,
and truely give of themselves.
And they have asked for nothing in return.
These are my heros,people who help make a difference.
In my life and the lives of all they come in contact with.
thanks,

"I'm just gettin' on for a MINUTE"

I got up this morning, but haven’t yet dressed.
My dishes aren’t done, and my house is a mess.
Have not done my work, have not fed the cat,
Just on for a second, and popped into “chat”.

I used to watch TV, I used to cook Mex,
I think I remember I used to have SEX!
I used to walk upright, now roll on my chair,
‘Tho it causes the neighbors and children to STARE!

I wanted to travel around on the Net,
Been too busy chatting to get on there yet!
I wanted to spreadsheet, word process, or paint,
But gettin’ on with 'em is what I just ain’t!

So much to learn and I wanted to, but
I’m too busy chatting and splitting a gut,
“lisnin’” to people like NH and Cin,
Oh, gawd, what a fix I have got myself in!

Then up pops a name on my neat BuddyList,
Think I’ll go out and give HIS tail a twist!
And in comes an IM from some weirdo-guy,
I cuss ‘im, insult ‘im, and tell him ‘bye ‘bye.

Is there a 12-step support group, or such?
For those of us folks who just chat on too much?
If there was a group, I would like it just fine,
Except that it prob’ly would be here on line!

Are there therapists here? I think that I saw some.
It’s got me, it’s GOT me, it’s power is AWESOME!
It’s my new computer, I’ve had it one week,
Now I look in the mirror and I see a geek.

Or maybe a geekess, but I see the signs,
Please help me, please help me, please get me off line!
Or better, please e-mail a burger and fries,
‘Cuz I’m staying ON here, at least ‘til I DIES!!

copyright: K. Weston

(LadyZinnia's Web Site)

The Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others, even dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater
and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love for in the
face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in
sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself
with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue
and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul.

With all its shams, drudgery,
and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.

Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrman,1927

Deteriorata Go placidly amid the noise and the waste and remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof. Avoid quiet & passive persons unless you are in need of sleep. Rotate your tires. Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself & heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys; know what to kiss & when. Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three do. Wherever possible, put people on hold. Be comforted that in the face of all aridity & disillusionment & despite the changing fortunes of time, there is always a big future in computer maintenance. Remember the Pueblo. Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle & mutilate. Know yourself; if you need help, call the FBI. Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially with those persons closest to you -- that lemon on your left, for instance. Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls would scarcely get your feet wet. Fall not in love therefore; it will stick to your face. Gracefully surrender the things of youth, birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan; & let not the sands of time get in your lunch. Hire people with hooks. For a good time, call 555-4311; ask for Ken. Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese; & reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Milwaukee. You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here, & whether you can hear it or not, the universe is laughing behind your back. Therefore make peace with your God whatever you conceive Him to be -- Hairy Thunderer or Cosmic Muffin. With all its hopes, dreams, promises, & urban renewal, the world continues to deteriorate. Give up. Copyright National Lampoon. Written by Tony Hendra. (Although this is copyright, I have looked it up and seen it on many other peoples' sites, but, as with the others poems - if you see this here and would rather it weren't here - then please let me know - thanks) (Thanks jaycee!)

(This one I don't understand so well, but then I am not a Unix person! Some of you might though!)

Geekerata

(A UNIX Analog of Desiderata (Max Ehrman, 1927))
(mainly as addressed to a network process)

Route placidly amid channel noise and network failures,
And remember what throughput there may be in executing all alone.

As far as possible, without overflowing buffer
Be on communicative terms with all processes.
Broadcast your data quietly and clearly
And listen(2) to others.
Even to the null and the unreachable,
They too have their requests.
Avoid long and argumentative sessions
They are burdensome to the ether.

If you compare your priority with others'
You may become vain or bitter
For always there will be greater and lesser processes than yourself.

Enjoy your CPUtime as well as your idletime.
Keep cognizance of your portmapper, however low-level
It is a constant port in the changing mappings of the network.

Exercise caution in your execution,
For the kernel is full of traps.
But let this not blind you to what swap space there is;
Many channels strive for high bandwidths, and everywhere
Computing is full of parallelism.

Be yourself. (Check with getpid(2) frequently)
Especially do not forge NFS file handles.
Neither be cynical about sockets,
For in the face of all congestion and delays
They are as powerful as STREAMS.

Take kindly the influx of new requests,
Gracefully re-prioritizing the older ones.

Nurture support of check-points to rollback from sudden crashes
But do not thrash pages due to imagined pagefaults:
Many core dumps are born of bus error or segmentation faults.

Beyond a nominal consideration,
Be nice(1) to other processes.

You are a child in the kernel space
No less than the daemons and the device drivers,
You have a right to execute here.
And whether or not it is apparent to you
No doubt the kernel is crashing, though it shouldn't.

Therefore be at peace with your programmer
However geeky you think s/he is.
And wherever your read(2)'s and recvfrom(2)'s,
In the noisy communication channels of the network,
Keep a valid (void *) buf available in your address space.
With all its stopped jobs, missing arguments and broken pipes,
It is still a UNIX shell.

Be backward-compatible.
Strive to be up and running always.