Joyce's Paradise is back

I am a Chinese post-operative MtF transsexual living in Hong Kong. Normally I do not disclose this in my real life, but here on internet I would like to share my feelings and experience with sincere people. As you can see, my name is Joyce but actually it is my old name that I do not use in my real life anymore. In order to protect myself, however, I still use it here. Those who know me in real person, please do not call my real name when you sign my guestbook, otherwise I may have trouble; thanks so much!


This home page was established in the summer of 1997, when I was depressed and in need of knowing some like-minded people to talk with and to get support from. By the spring of 1998, when I was still a university student, I committed suicide but unfortunately I did not die. Even worse was, this news was soon propagated by the media, all the people of my university as well as those of the other universities knew my secret and I still do not know how they found my website. The URL was then posted by someone at one of my school's BBS. Since then, many people signed my guestbook, including good ones and bad ones, supportive and hostile. I felt very uncomfortable that too many people knew my secret and my identity, I disclosed myself too much. Simultaneously, I was too vulnerable to face those hostile and insulting messages and emails everyday, these really hurt me and made me cry. After struggling for months, this home page was eventually removed in September 1998. Also, I terminated my study without graduation to escape from the bad situation.


After being approved by my psychiatrist of the gender identity team, I had my operations done in Hong Kong from Dec 1999 to Jan 2000. Since then I started a new life and nobody knows my past except my old friends and of course, my supportive family.


Transsexual Women's Resources - the most informative website I have ever seen