I'm a relatively normal (normal being a subjective opinion), average guy; overweight, underemployed. Became a divorce statistic, cruelly enough on my birthday. One cat, to which I'm allergic. Oh well.

I mean, a state worker? Really? It sometimes feels like I'm at the bottom of the food chain.

I've been told, though, that I'm of above average intelligence, like that means anything in the real world. Could I get more money if I put that on my resume? Probably not. I think the reality is I'm possessed of a certain "idiot savant" quality in the area of English; I'm a Rainman who, instead of counting, writes and talks endlessly. And I'm an excellent driver.

Anyway, there's a veritable smorgasbord of people you've never seen before littered around here, along with my opinionated commentary. Something to look forward to, huh? Maybe it'll change your life. So let's get to it!

Read about stuff, like

Tangential Scottiocity: A Smattering of Friends I have Disneyland! I LOVE Disneyland! Fletcher's Chicken	Paths to and from Scottness: My contribution to the gene pool My siblings Where I came from Where my mom and dad came from My adorable cousin who loves me A letter from a long-lost branch of the family
Scottlike things I do: Some books I read once Some movies I saw once Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Riding The 2004 Redwood Run Other hobby type stuff I've done Oooo, Barracuda (it's my old project car)	Creating Scottland: A story about paramecium which I wrote for my adorable cousin who loves me Some of my ambiguous lyrics The many bands I've been in My musical influences Musical instruments and stuff
Scottfree, as it were: The ex Some women who used to be interested in me Another of my web pages, this one just pics of Fletcher's birthday party in a caboose, and some of my adorable counsin.	Adrift in a sea of Scottishness: Animals that live in or near my house Jokes I managed to remember How to quickly offend people and make enemies Odd toys Dreams and Nightmares

The guestbook was closed for a while due to excessive spamming, which is funny since almost nobody looks at my webpage, so what's the point in putting advertisements in my guestbook?

View the old, perfectly workable, guestbook,
which I wasn't told Yahoo!Geocities changed,
if you dare.

View the NEW AND MAYBE IMPROVED guestbook,
which I wasn't told Yahoo!Geocities changed,
if you dare.

My son watching television buck naked!

Here are two of his poems.

heart to heart, heart to heart shoot, shoot goes the love dart

I love Valentines Day This is the way I say hey on Valentines Day

Keep in mind, he was like three years old when he wrote them.

I've posted my first little batch of original pop-rock (you know, like the candy that makes your head explode) type songs (first posted, not first written). You can find at least one of them linked in the ambiguous lyrics section.

since Sept. 10, 1998. Wow. Twenty years on the web, and nothing but older.