Saturday, 13 April 2002: This is being written in a day early so Katie can't say I forgot (you know me, I always wait submit weekend news until the following Monday, but this was just too important to hold off). Happy Anniversary, Katie. We've now been married six months. I can't believe it's been that long.
Friday, 12 April 2002: I have officially joined the "Old People's Club." Let me tell you my story...
Yesterday was an absolutely gorgeous day by any standards up here in Northeastern Illinois. High 60s or low 70s... Little to no wind... Blue skies... Few clouds. You get the picture. Katie was at work at the pharmacy and I knew she wasn't going to be around until sometime after 9 p.m. So I decided I was going to venture into the park in our backyard and practice some drives with my golf disks. I had to wait until around 6:30 because the park is filled up quite quickly by local kids soccer clubs playing their afterschool games. Fine. No big deal. At 6:30, I went out there because the park was empty save for me and three kids who were playing baseball. You remember the routine from when you were young. One kid batting, one kid pitching, one kid fielding. One of the hits got away from the fielder and it was pretty close to me. So I nabbed it and threw it back to the kid fielding. I think he was probably about 10 or 11 years old. I'm a bad judge of age so don't hold me to my guess. After I threw it to him, he yells back, "Thanks mistuh!" Sounded just like a kid from the Bronx with a slightly heavy accent on the "Mistuh."
Am I really a 'mister?' Jeezus, I'm only 27. I'm not that damn old, am I? It's one thing when a kid working in a store calls you 'mister.' They're expected to be somewhat courteous (although I strongly believe the courtesy standard has faltered as of late in many retail venues). It's a totally different situation when you're called something like 'mister' or 'sir' by some kid out playing ball in a park. You're not supposed to be formal. Does that just mean that this kid's overly polite? Or am I really that friggin' old? Wait, don't answer that question. I don't want to know the answer.
Thursday, 11 April 2002: I was reading through upcomingmovies.com this morning when I came upon a preview page for a pretty intriguing concept of a movie. The film is, at this point in time, going to be entitled Tiptoes and will star Gary Oldman, Kate Beckinsale, Matthew McConaughey, and Patricia Arquette. To start, this is a pretty odd bunch of actors to put together. I have seen weirder, but this is close.
The premise of the movie is where it gets really odd. McConaughey and Beckinsale are a couple with a baby on the way. He's reluctant to have the baby because there is a history of dwarfism in his family. Somehow, he managed to grow up tall while his twin brother is a dwarf (is that P.C.? Ah, who cares?). Enter the twin brother, Gary Oldman. First off, can you possibly see McConaughey and Oldman as twins? I sure as hell can't. No amount of makeup in the world could make me suspend my disbelief enough to fall for that one. To make things even better, Oldman will be digitally shrunken much like they did to Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, and John Rhys-Davies in The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Want the even-bigger kicker? Beckinsale falls in love with the digitally-dwarfed Oldman. I have trouble imagining her falling in love with him even at normal stature, let alone have him act charming enough to bedazzle her from waist height. C'mon, I'm used to the good ol' psychotic Gary that we've seen in such classics as The Professional and True Romance. I mean, really, he played Sid Vicious for God's sake (Sid & Nancy). Now he's a dwarf with a heart of gold and a libido to match? I'm there. This I gotta see.
Wednesday, 10 April 2002: This is going to be a relatively stickier issue, so if you're too young or easily offended, might I suggest going elsewhere. You've been warned.
The National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML) has introduced a new billboard ad that features new NYC mayor David Bloomberg. No, Bloomberg is not an advocate of smoking pot. The reason he's featured is because while he was on the campaign trail, he was asked if he ever smoked pot. To avoid being characterized like George W. Bush was when asked the same question, Bloomberg said, "You bet I did. And I enjoyed it." Not that he had to be quite that emphatic about it, but he was. So, NORML put his picture on the billboard with that quote right beside him and the accompanying text on the billboard read, "It's NORML to smoke pot." Bloomberg isn't happy about it, but he realizes it's something he said and he has to live with it.
Well, National Lampoon created a spoof of this ad regarding the current controversy with Catholic priests and their supposed child-molesting tendencies. The spoof ad appears as a pop-up ad when you go to their website. I've got the image here just in case they've removed the pop-up ad. Pretty damned funny, but you've gotta have a gutter sense of humor.
Tuesday, 9 April 2002: If you've ever read through websites regarding highly anticipated upcoming movies, you'll see much speculation abound. Photos... fake reviews... scripts... you get my point. Well, I found a site recently that had a "copy" of the script for Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones. I can't say for sure if it's the real deal or not, but my coworker Eric and I have been reading through it and we've found lots of dialogue that matches up perfectly with the trailers and the description of certain scenes matches up, as well. Is it genuine? I guess we won't know until May 17th for sure. But if the film is anything like this script, I'll be there with bells on (not literally, of course). This is really the first positive feeling I've had about Episode II so far. After Episode I came out, I was disillusioned to say the very least.
As a note to the S.S... er... Lucasfilm... no, I do not have the script anywhere on my site so there is no need to use brute force to make me (or, in Lucasfilm lingo, "gently persuade me to") remove it. Therefore, all I can do is guide you, fair readers, to where I found it, if you ask me very, very nicely.
Monday, 8 April 2002: The Mix Morning Show this morning announced a new contest of theirs called "Celebrity Sightings." They will be picking three couples to fly out to Los Angeles this weekend armed with a disposable camera with the goal being to snap the best shot of a celebrity. The station will decide on what the best single shot is from each couple and post them on their website for the fans to decide the best overall shot. The photos do not have to show one of the people from the couple with the celebrity, but it doesn't hurt. The winning couple gets to attend the Mix's "Breakfast of Goo" or whatever the hell they're calling the event when they will be sitting in on a private performance with the Goo Goo Dolls. Now, I'm intrigued by the concept of "Celebrity Sightings." But I feel that the qualification process is a better prize than the actual prize. I can't stand the Goo Goo Dolls personally. I think they are a highly overrated band that gets overplayed on just about any station that does play them, the Mix included. But how cool is it to be given a free weekend trip to Los Angeles to just wander around looking for celebrities? That is truly the best part of the whole deal. I think what would make it even funnier was if some celebrity felt so pestered by one of the couples that they had them arrested for stalking. Imagine how funny it would be for the Mix to have to post bail and pay for them to stay out in L.A. until their arraignment. Heh.
Saturday, 6 April 2002: I was driving out to my friend Brian's house today to pick him up so we could go play disc golf when I noticed one of those things that, without fail, annoys the piss out of me. Have you ever driven around in a new housing development or subdivision that is touted as a "living community" and seen one of those fake guardhouses by the gate to the so-called "community?" This guardhouse, of course, had no guard residing in it and never has and never will. What is the point of building such structures? Does said guardhouse provide a security blanket for the subdivision? Do people, when they go searching for a homesite, see the guardhouse and say, "hey, look, we're protected! We'll be safe in this area thanks to our phantom guards!" Do potential burglars drive up and say, "holy hell. Better case another subdivision. This one's got a phantom guard!" Please tell me... I am desperately trying to understand the logic behind this giant waste of bricks.
Friday, 5 April 2002: Thankfully, the baseball season has started. I've been in withdrawal because I love baseball and I haven't had a dose since last November. At least I had football to tide me over until that ended in February. I've had two months with no sports to watch and it's been killing me. So, now that the season has started, I'm gonna make my picks for teams to watch. Don't ask me just yet why I've picked these teams. I'm not necessarily placing bets on their chances to go all the way, but I think they've got a good chance of turning some heads.
In the National League, I'm looking at both the St. Louis Cardinals and the Arizona Diamondbacks. The Cards are perrenial faves of mine even without Mark McGwire. I think that they can do some major buttwhipping this year because they've got a strong team and they've been on the cusp of breaking through to some serious postseason play for the last few seasons. The D'Backs haven't really lost much of their championship team from last year and I think a lot of the vets have really liked the taste of success that they got last year... especially Mark Grace. Once you've had a taste of the good life, it's hard to go back to anything less. I believe Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling are still capable of burning up opposing bats. I think you could see the D'Backs make a repeat trip even if they are not the Atlanta Braves or the New York Yankees, both of whom almost always are counted among preseason faves to still be playing in October (even though it's usually a case of the Braves boffing it up somehow while the Yanks win it all).
In the American League, I think that the Minnesota Twins might do some good. They'll be looking to stick it to Commissioner Bud Selig who has the Twins on his short list of teams to axe should his plans for league contraction become a reality. Fans will start pouring into the Metrodome to support their nearly-dead team and the players will react accordingly. Like they say, sports are a Catch-22... you can't have fans at the games without giving them some good play to watch, but it's hard to play well if you don't have the support of your fans. Somehow the Cubs have defied this logic for decades. I still don't understand how. They typically don't play that well (with some exceptions), but they almost always fill the stands. You gotta give Cubs fans points for dedication.
So now you have my early season picks. They are in writing so you can stick it to me later in the season when my whole plan goes boffo.
Thursday, 4 April 2002: While I will admit that E.R. has gotten a bit hard to swallow as of late (don't ask me why... it just has a weird vibe going... some of it is becoming a bit too soap opera-esque), I did like the way they handled Dr. Mark Greene's (Anthony Edwards) final episode as a doctor tonight. Yes, he is still in the show until the end of the season, he's just not gonna be working in the E.R. anymore. For those who have been out of the show for a while or perhaps have never watched it, Greene was diagnosed sometime last season with an inoperable brain tumor. As would be expected, it has affected his ability to work as a doctor. Tonight, he realized that he really doesn't have much time left and that he's gonna spend it his way... no work, no chemo, just him and his family.
There were really three scenes that I liked in particular in the episode. The first is the little girl who became Greene's "final patient." She starts going off on a bit of a mythology lesson, teaching Greene things he never realized. That kinda started the ball rolling. He realized that there is so much more to life. Cliche... yes. But, still handled well enough without trying to shove the realization down our throats. The second was the homeless man who Greene had been helping all night. He tells Greene that the rain that has been persisting all night has stopped. When Greene leaves at the end of his shift, the rain outside has, in fact, stopped. Kinda the not-so-subtle "you've made the right decision" nudge from up on high, or a throwback to the Jimmy Cliff song "I Can See Clearly Now (the Rain is Gone)." Okay, maybe not as well handled as the little girl's mythology lesson, but still and all the same. The final scene involved a farewell between Greene and Dr. John Carter (Noah Wyle) outside the E.R. Greene picks up the basketball that is always sitting out there and instead of shooting it like he normally does, he passes it off to Carter saying that it needs more air. Sort of the symbolic passing of the torch but on a more casual level while also telling him that he needs to "breathe more life" into the E.R. The toss off being to Carter because he is the only other original cast member to have been with the show the whole time. Sherry Stringfield is also an original cast member, but she left for a couple of seasons and then came back.
Will the show survive without Greene and Dr. Peter Benton (Eriq LaSalle) who left earlier this season? Dunno. The staff are going to need to find some good actors to fill in their shoes. They started the process by bringing in another newbie (Sharif Atkins as Dr. Michael Gallant) fresh out of medical school which will allow the writers to develop his character from the ground up much as they did with Carter. Tonight, they introduced another new character in Dr. Gregory Pratt (Mekhi Phifer). He's not a regular cast member yet, but don't be surprised if you see his name and face in the opening cast shots before the end of the season. Otherwise, we'll just have to wait and see how the show does overall next season.
Wednesday, 3 April 2002: I realize that the Primetime Emmy Awards happened way back when in November. However, I feel that November is a bad time to be giving awards for a season that has only just begun. It is now April and the Primetime TV season will be winding down in another month and a half or so. Midseason replacement shows have kicked in full swing. Shows that sucked early on have been given a chance to redeem themselves (or not, in many cases... seriously, Jack and Karen winning supporting awards for "Will & Grace" this year with how bad the writing has been?!?). In other words, I feel that this is the perfect time to give out the real awards... the only awards that matter... the Primetime Kapgar.com Awards.
*applause*
Please remember that these votes reflect only my opinions. I'll give Katie a chance to post her picks later on after she reads this entry on the page. Below is the list of awards and who I feel deserve them. You may feel free to e-mail me your votes or categories that should be included and maybe I'll post them later.
Please note, when I say "Rookie," I mean anyone who has just started this season either in a new series or an established show regardless of if they've been in another show before or appeared as a guest star in another show. "Veteran" is anyone who has been with an established series since before this season. And these are my awards, so I can declare a tie. Also, I don't get any sort of endorsement or payment for this, so there ain't none of them cool little statuettes. Should any of the winners actually read this page (Ha!), please just revel in the knowledge that you've won.
- Best Veteran Actor (Comedy) - Damon Wayans - Michael Kyle, "My Wife and Kids"
- Best Veteran Actress (Comedy) - Jennifer Aniston - Rachel Greene, "Friends"
- Best Veteran Actor (Drama) - (tie) Chi McBride - Steven Harper, "Boston Public"; and William Peterson - Gil Grissom, "CSI"
- Best Veteran Actress (Drama) - Charlotte Ross - Connie McDowell, "NYPD Blue"
- Best Rookie Actor (Comedy) - Ken Marino - Andy, "Leap of Faith"
- Best Rookie Actress (Comedy) - Sarah Paulson - Faith Wardwell, "Leap of Faith"
- Best Rookie Actor (Drama) - Michael Rapaport - Danny Hanson, "Boston Public"
- Best Rookie Actress (Drama) - Jeri Ryan - Ronnie Cooke, "Boston Public"
- Best Veteran Kiddie (Comedy or Drama) - Erik Per Sullivan - Dewey, "Malcolm in the Middle"
- Best Rookie Kiddie (Comedy or Drama) - Hallee Hirsch - Rachel Greene (not the same Rachel Greene from "Friends," obviously), "ER"
- Best Game Show Host - Frank Nicotero, "Street Smarts"
- Best Veteran Sitcom - "My Wife and Kids"
- Best Rookie Sitcom - "Leap of Faith"
- Best Veteran Drama - "CSI"
- Best Rookie Drama - "The American Embassy"
- Best Damn Show on the Tube - "Boston Public"
- Best Overall Network - with "Boston Public," "Simpsons," "Malcolm in the Middle," and "The American Embassy" in its rotation... FOX
If you don't agree with my picks... tough luck. I've said it before and I'll say it again... if you want your own opinion, get your own website. Or, to be somewhat more diplomatic, you can e-mail me your picks if you so desire.
Tuesday, 2 April 2002: I was asking Katie about this yesterday and now I want your opinion... Yesterday, as we all know, was April Fools Day. The night before, forecasters were saying that the weather would be up in the 50s, yet anyone who either lives in the Chicagoland area or watched the news probably knows that we had a mini-snowstorm instead. It only wound up being an inch of snow, but still and all the same, seven people in the midwest died as a result of the storm. Katie suggested that maybe the forecasters were pulling one heckuvan April Fools prank on the public. Now, my question is if this was a prank on the part of forecasters and people dressed and made plans as though it was going to be the predicted 50 degrees, can the forecasters be sued by the general public for intentionally misleading them? I'm not saying that I would sue them. I could give a damn. But, this is the United States -- the home of the frivolous lawsuit -- and I wouldn't be surprised if someone does come up with this idea. I can't imagine how they would go about proving it, but leave it to the lawyers to find a way. So, could a prank like this be grounds for a lawsuit? Lemme know what you think.
Monday, 1 April 2002: Well, you won't be hearing the Chicago Bears say that they aren't getting any respect this coming season. And I'm lovin' it. For the 2002-03, the Bears will be featured in three Monday Night Football games. Hell yes. The first will be on October 7 against the Green Bay Packers (always a classic rivalry) in Chicago... or should I say Champaign-Urbana since Soldier Field is undergoing renovations this season. The second is an away game scheduled for November 18 against the St. Louis Rams. The final MNF game is in Miami against the Dolphins on December 9. If you'd like to see the schedule for all teams for the entire 2002 season, head on over to NFL.com. Or, if you'd like to provide me with tickets to any of these games - hell, I'll take tickets to any Bears game - contact me and make me an offer I can't refuse.
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