Waffle FAQ
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Q: Hi!  How are you doing?
A: Fine, thank you.

Q: What is Maddogg's House of Waffles about?
A: You know all those popular web sites with cool pictures, hot links,
   discussion boards about interesting topics?  This page is nothing like 
   them.

Q: Do you work in a restaurant or something?
A: I would if it weren't for the incident.

Q: I have a 20 year old beautiful tall skinny blonde daughter, would you like
   to have hot wild kinky sex with her for many, many hours?
A: YES!

Q: How often do you update the web page?
A: As often as Mistress Veronica whips until I scream "Yes, Mommy, Harder!"

Q: Do you like to torture small animals?
A: My attorney advised me not to answer that question.

Q: You are very wrong.  Why haven't you been brought up on charges?
A: Senate voted unanimously to drop all charges on the grounds that they 
   didn't want to see any more evidence.

Q: What is that awful noise in the background?
A: That's my father watching the Playboy Channel.

Q: If we flood your E-Mail box with SPAM, what will happen?
A: Ever seen "Deliverance"?

Q: You're the Devil, aren't you?
A: Shhhhhhhhh...

Q: Do you accept sexual favors?
A: Only from attractive women.

Q: Do you accept donations?
A: YES!

Q: Did you once belong to a cult that worshipped Kevin Johnson?
A: Yes, I did go to Sac High.

Q: What is your favorite waffle recipe?
A: Step 1: Take waffles out of package.
        2: Put waffles in toaster.  Use a low setting so to not burn the 
           waffles.
        3: Wait until they pop up.
        4: Butter and syrup.

Q: Do you like to smoke crack and play Pong?
A: Yes, would you like to join me?

Q: Are you insane?
A: Yes and no, maybe and certainly.

Q: Is someone planning to kill me?
A: Yes.

Q: SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!  IT'S PEOPLE!
A: I'm sorry sir, did you have a question?

Q: How do respond to the allegations that the rottweilers have brought 
   against you?
A: The only comment I can make is no comment.

Q: WHY, GOD, WHY?
A: Because God hates you.

Q: Do you want to see me naked?
A: Yes, Jenna Jameson.

Q: How about me?
A: No, Marv Albert.

Q: Hey, isn't that illegal in all fifty states.
A: Only if you get caught.

Q: If Ozzy Osbourne were to kill Hanson, and you were the judge, would 
you dismiss the case?
A: Yes, absolutely.

Q: Who was that blonde I saw you with?
A: I have no comment at this time.

Q: Are these really questions that you are asked frequently?
A: As far as you know.

Q: We have pictures.
A: I have friends who can kill you and take those pictures.

Q: Will this ever be updated?
A: Just do the naughty chant and it shall be so.

Q: What if Geocities realizes you have SMUT on their server hmmm?
A: I'm reasonably certain that Geocities is too dumb to read and probably 
   only check for naughty pictures anyway.

Q: But what if they find the pictures?
A: You have to know the secret URL to get to those, and I'm certain Geocities
   is too dumb to ever find that.

Q: I'm a loser.  Can I still hangout here?
A: Of course!  Maddogg's House of Waffles is a web site, therefore no one 
even knows you're here nor do they care, Just like in your real life!

Q: I had sex with my best friends grandmother, what should I do?
A: I don't know.  What does his grandmother look like?

Q: Don't you owe me money?
A: No, you owe me money.

Q: Are you sure?
A: Yes.

Q: I'm that girl who gave you the best head you've ever had, do you remember me?
A: Yes!  You still got my number, right?

Q: Why did you leave AOL?
A: Do you enjoy being analy raped?

Q: Aren't you that guy who I caught...
A: No! your thinking of some one else.

Q: Why do I have to give a urine sample?
A: If I answered that one they'd kick me out of the brotherhood for sure.

Q: Is it strange I should change?
A: I don't know, why don't you ask her?
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At least it's not Menudo.
Maddogg