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| Ferris Bueler's Day Off |
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bueller.wav(207K)
Teacher: (taking attendance)computer.wav(53K)
Bueller?....... Bueller?.......Bueller?
Girl: Um, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with a girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious.
Ferris: I asked for a car, I got a computer. How's that for being born under a bad sign?playsick.wav(74K)
Ferris plays "The Blue Danube" on his keyboard using sampled coughs and sick sounds.diamond.wav(79K)
Ferris: Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond.likenass.wav(85K)
Mr. Rooney: He jeopardizes my ability to effectively govern this student body.dude.wav(114K)
Grace: He makes you look like an ass is what he does, Ed.
Grace: The sportos and motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads... they all adore him. They think he's a rightous dude.asshole.wav(33K)
Cameron : (pretending to be Sloane's dad) )
Pardon my French... but you're an asshole!psandqs.wav(106K)
Cameron: (as Sloane's dad) Now you just mind you P's and Q's buster.... and remember who your dealing with.ill_go.wav(410K)
Ferris: Bueller. Ferris Bueller.
Cameron: He'll keep callin' me.... he'll keep callin' me until I go over. He'll make me feel guilty...THIS IS.... This is ridiculous, ok? I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go... wai.. I'll go... shit.(car starts... then stops, sounds of Cameron hitting his hand against the car's seat)
)
GOD DAMMIT! ......(car starts and roars... Cameron screams... car stops.)
)
Forget it... that's it.ferrari.wav(260K)
Cameron: The 1961 Ferrari 250GT California. Less than a hundred were made. My father spent three years restoring this car. It is his love, it is his passion...understd.wav(174K)
Ferris: ..it is his fault he didn't lock the gararge.
Snooty Maitre D': I appreciate your understanding.batter.wav(128K)
Ferris: Don't think twice. It's understanding that makes it possible for people like us to tolerate a person like yourself.
Maitre D': Thank you.
Ferris: Don't mention it.
Cameron: Eh... batta batta batta batta suuuwing batta... c'mon..dankeshn.wav(584K)
Ferris/Cameron: Eh... batta batta batta suuuwing batta...
Cameron: Hecan'thithecan'thithecan'thithecan'thithecan'thit suuuuwing batta...
Ferris: Ladies and gentlemen, you're such a wonderful crowd we'd like to play a little tune for you. It's one of my personal favorites, and I'd like to dedicate it to a young man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today. Cameron Frye... this one's for you.bezerk.wav(205K)(Ferris lip synchs the first verse of "Danke Shein.") .
Ferris: Here's where Cameron goes bezerk.holyshit.wav(68K)Cameron screams forever.
Cameron: Whoa...... Holy shit!testicle.wav(138K)
Jeannie: If you say "Ferris Bueller" you lose a testicle.life.wav(63K)
Hood: Oh, you know him?
Ferris: Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.mortuary.wav(63K)
Camron: You have reached the Cortland Brothers Mortuary. We are deeply sorry we are unable come to the phone right now but if you leave your name and number we will get back to you as soon as it's humanly possible.
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