Ponder these questions when you don't want to think about important stuff!

•  If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
•  Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
•  What do chickens think we taste like?
•  What do people in China call their good plates?
•  What do you call a male ladybug?
•  What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
•  When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
•  Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
•  Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
•  Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
•  Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
•  Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
•  Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
•  Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
•  Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
•  Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
•  How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
•  If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
•  Why is a bra singular and panties plural?
•  You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
•  If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
•  If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
•  If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
•  If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
•  Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
•  Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
•  Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
•  What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
•  Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
•  If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
•  If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
•  If you throw a cat out of the house, does it become kitty litter?
•  If aspirins are always "Take Two," why not increase the size of ONE?