I wanted to address trying to conceive simply because I happened upon this great method and wanted to share it! Many of you may be familiar with it, but this is for those of you who aren't. First of all, go out and buy/borrow the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. This book outlines the Fertility Awareness Method. You can use this method for birth control, but it's ideal for trying to conceive.

The problem most people have is a misunderstanding of their bodies. We're led to believe that "most women" ovulate on day 14 of their cycle. Therefore when we try to conceive we should try on or around day 14. Well, unfortunately most women don't really ovulate on day 14; it varies. If your cycle is more or less than 28 days, it's very likely you ovulate on a day other than the magical day 14. The Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) teaches you that by observing bodily changes and your basal body temperature you can accurately predict ovulation. Now this isn't your mother's "rhythm method" and you can't just use basal body temperature (BBT); BBT only tells you when you've already ovulated. Too late for that little eggie. You must "baby dance" prior to ovulation in order to get pregnant. So by observing your cervical fluid (it usually gets more like eggwhite as you get closer to ovulation) and by recording your BBT (it will usually spike .2F the day of or after ovulation) you can fairly accurately determine your most fertile time. Also, usually 18 days of the higher post-ovulatory temperatures is indicative of a pregnancy. Sometimes your temperature even goes up to a third, higher level of temps after implantation, which is also a good indicator of pregnancy. So this method even helps determine pregnancy!

Again, the book explains this in much further detail and I highly recommend it. As you can see from the above information, you can also use this method as birth control; you just abstain during your fertile time or use an alternate form of birth control during that time.

After six months of charting and trying, if you haven't gotten pregnant it might be a good idea to consult your doctor.

Trying to conceive can be an interesting journey. I was very fortunate in that I was able to get pregnant fairly easily. With Gage and Maddie, I didn't know about the FAM so we were just winging it. I remember those months each time; the first part of the month was "will we catch the egg?" then the second part of the month was "did we catch that egg?". It can be a very trying experience. And frustrating if it seems things aren't going as quickly as you'd like. It's important during this time to maintain your relationship with your spouse or significant other. It's too easy to get caught up in the trying and stop enjoying your life. If you visit those trying to conceive boards it's amazing to see how many people get pregnant during those "taking a break from trying" cycles. I am a believer that stress can interfere with the whole process. But again, I've not been there, done that when it comes to infertility, and I highly recommend getting support and information from other couples going through the same thing.

The Taking Charge of Your Fertility website is a great source of information and support.

From the moment you see those two blue lines your life changes forever. It's like you've been taken over by some otherworldly presence. Pregnancy is a time of vast changes and tremendous growth - and I don't just mean your belly! Those nine months are yours to cherish and enjoy.

Perhaps because I am expecting again, or perhaps because I feel so strongly about pregnancy and birth, I've decided to add pages on this topic to the website. Naturally, the topic is very large. So I'm going to speak about my experiences with pregnancy and address some issues I have with western medicine and the thinking that doctors must "manage" pregnancy and childbirth. Just remember this whole process is completely up to you, whether you opt to have an unassisted birth and provide your own prenatal care or you decide you want a traditional OB as your care provider and a hospital as your place of birth. The important thing is that you take back the decision making process. Evaluate what you feel comfortable with and what you don't...decide how you want your pregnancy to go and make it happen.

In most obstetric practices today the OB makes the decisions, he or she tells you what you need to do, what tests you'll have to have and how you should give birth. During my first pregnancy, I will admit I was a sheep. I did as I was told like a good little girl and it got me an overmedicated and overanalyzed pregnancy and birth. I started to realize I had some choices here...in my second pregnancy I felt strong enough to turn down tests I didn't feel were necessary, but the ones I did have just served to increase my stress and make me nervous over problems that, in the end, did not exist. In both instances, I had an OB as my primary care provider for the pregnancy. This time I've opted for a midwife and oh what a difference! The appointments aren't the obligatory 10 minutes...they're as long as I need them to be. I feel I have more freedom, and more acceptance if I decline certain tests. I feel this pregnancy will be affirming rather than alarming. I'm not afraid my body will "betray" me this time...

Keep reading for more information, or click one of the links below to go to an area of interest. Always keep in mind I am not a medical professional, therefore my opinions and the information provided herein should not be construed as medical advice. I'm just sharing information I have gained through various sources.

Tests, tests and more tests: a breakdown of routine tests and their risks and benefits
Natural remedies for pregnancy discomforts
Helping your body have a healthy pregnancy

It seems there are about a zillion tests out there available to pregnant women. Which are safe and which are not? What are the risks? Are they outweighed by the possible benefits? Here again I will say you must make your own decisions. You must read, read and read some more. You must understand the implications and benefits each test has to offer before you accept or decline. Below I will outline some of the more common tests and what information I've obtained about each.

Ultrasound - This has always been the "safe" test. It's seemingly non invasive...soundwaves are used to provide images of the fetus and placenta, or in the case of Doppler (which is also soundwaves) to provide the sound of the heart beating. For years this test has been administered without anyone questioning it's safety. Well, the safety has come into question as of late. There is evidence that ultrasound can actually increase the temperature of the amniotic fluid; it's unknown what the risks of this might be. One study mentions the fact that children subject to multiple ultrasounds in utero have a higher chance of being left handed *when there is no genetic tie to left handedness*. It's important that I point that out, because genetically determined left-handedness is normal. Left-handedness in an individual with no genetic predisposition can be indicative of minor brain damage. There have been studies linking ultrasound to miscarriages in mice. Not to mention many mothers report seeing their baby move away from the doppler or ultrasound device or even hold their hands over their ears. One thing I noticed in doing my reading is that none of the studies definitively link these problems to ultrasound; there's no hard proof. And many mention that it's repeated ultrasound usage that tends to lead to problems. What did I do? I have had one ultrasound this pregnancy thus far. Personally, I felt the benefits of seeing the heartbeat and knowing all was well when I was feeling unsure outweighed the possible problems. I do think repeated u/s use for no medically defined reason can be harmful, and then there are all those rent-a-doppler services out there so you can hear your baby's heartbeat whenever you want to..I don't think that's necessarily a good thing. But hearing it once a month and having perhaps one quick u/s to me seems within reason. If you're unsure, you can ask your doctor or midwife to use a fetoscope instead of the doppler. The fetoscope is a stethescope like device used to listen for the heartbeat. And you can always refuse an ultrasound if you really don't want it.

AFP or triple screen - On this one I have some strong personal opinions (but then again, what else is new?!). This test supposedly determines if you have a higher than normal risk for having a baby with Downs Syndrome or Spina Bifida. Unfortunately, the test has a very high rate of false positives. So high in fact that I'm not sure why they even recommend this test anymore. If you get an abnormal reading, your doctor will likely recommend an amnio or at the very least a level II ultrasound to rule out or confirm the problem. The test is normally done in early to mid second trimester. With Gage I was advised that the test indicated a higher than normal risk of Down's Syndrome. Needless to say, I freaked. We ended up having the level II ultrasound but not the amnio. I knew no matter what I wasn't going to terminate the pregnancy, so I didn't really care to risk the amnio. And Gage was perfectly fine. So this "false positive" turned a few weeks of my pregnancy into a nightmare. I feel the point at which the test is done, not many women would terminate. So why risk the mental anguish? This test is definitely one to pass on.

Amnioscentesis

CVS

Rhogam for rh negativity - While not really a test, I wanted to include this in here. If you're rh- you may be advised to have a Rhogam shot in mid to late pregnancy, then another after the baby is born. Here's why: If the mother is rh- and the father is rh+, the baby has a 50% chance of inheriting dad's rh+ blood type. If an rh- woman carries and rh+ baby and somehow their blood mingles (i.e. in an accident, if the cord is pulled during delivery of the placenta or is there is placenta previa/abruptio), the mother may become sensitized...this means that in a future pregnancy the mother's body might view the embryo as an "invader" and will kill it. Again, *only* if the mother was sensitized at some point. So after delivery of your first child who is rh+ you will be administered a Rhogam shot to stop this from happening. In each consecutive pregnancy you'll be advised to get the Rhogam in mid pregnancy (just as a backup, in case an accident or problem causes the mingling of mother and baby's blood prior to delivery) then again after birth. This protects any future pregnancies. The problem I have with this is that Rhogam contains mercury which would likely cross the placenta and is dangerous for baby. Also Rhogam is a human blood product; there have been reported incidences world wide of hepatitis being contracted from the shot. Only a few cases, but still...
The other problem is that one of the methods of blood being exchanged, the pulling of the cord during delivery of the placenta, is commonplace in American hospitals. This is another instance where you need to be vocal with your practitioner about what you don't want done. Otherwise odds of the blood mingling are quite low.
So what to do? First off have the father's blood tested; if he's rh- this is a non issue because the baby will inevitably be rh- also (since mother and father are both rh-). You can also have your blood tested for rh sensitivity. Know what your previous baby's blood types have been; if they've all been rh- you can be fairly sure you haven't been sensitized. And if you do decide to go with the shot, ask for WinRho, the new mercury free version.
As this is my last pregnancy and as both Gage and Maddie have been rh- (but Scott is rh+...darn!) I feel fairly confident in refusing the shot during pregnancy. If this baby is rh+ at birth, I will have WinRho after the birth. As an update, I did not feel we were going to have another baby after Mason was born so I didn't end up taking his cord blood in to be tested. But a couple months later, I was thinking "what if" so I did arrange to have my blood tested for rh sensitivity and I am not sensitized. So there are options out there other than getting the rhogam shot! Either test the baby's cord blood or have your own blood tested after birth (I will say though, it's much easier just to have the baby's cord blood tested, then you can get the shot if you have to. Otherwise if you wait and are sensitized, there's not much you can do at that point).

There are a myriad of birth choices available out there today. It's not just going to the hospital, meeting up with your OB and having an interventionist birth. Not that all hospital births are interventionist, but you have to really push to have no interventions. You can still have that hospital birth, but you can also choose to have your baby at a birth center, or at home attended by midwives or even at home unassisted. And the location of your birth is just one of the choices you have to make. You decide just how many and what kind of interventions are okay with you. And even these choices can change during the birth itself! I think it's very important to educate yourself on all the possibilities and then make the best decision for yourself. That said, I will share my opinions and experiences, and those of others I've talked to.

I feel it is important to have a drug free birth. I think doing so enables you to nurse more easily, recover more quickly and experience the entire process. As I've stated elsewhere on this site, my first birth was an induced/epidural/episiotomy type birth. I felt not involved, I felt like I wasn't really even there. My second birth was induced but no pain drugs. Oh, I felt like I was there all right. I felt like I was going to die. But it was better than my first. The last one was natural from start to finish, I began on my own and let my body do it's work. It was...amazing. There aren't really words to describe my homebirth. I'm so glad I did it and am still so proud of myself.

I'm not saying everyone will have that kind of experience, or even that everyone wants that type of experience. But it's important to know what you want and need during birth and then be able to ask for it and get it. I knew that in a hospital, I wouldn't be able to refuse monitoring (studies have shown that monitoring during birth increases the risk of a c-section but doesn't DEcrease the risk of fetal problems. Listening occasionally with a doppler gets the same result as an invasive monitor), I wouldn't be able to move around as much or get into alternative birthing positions (squatting during birth actually increases the pelvic opening to allow for larger or posterior babies to come down and out...in my case that turned out to be true. Mace was 11.5 lbs AND posterior and was delivered in a modified squat position). I wouldn't have been able to easily refuse an episiotomy (only had a first degree tear that healed without stitches). I wouldn't have been able to refuse the eye ointment (it burns and I knew I didn't have any STD's) or the Vitamin K shot (only needed to stop bleeding, since we weren't circ'ing and I had been taking alfalfa to increase my own VitK that would get to him through my breastmilk, there was no reason for the shot) or waited a week for the PKU test to get it at the ideal time. I mean, I guess I could have waged a battle with the doctors and nurses but I didn't want to have to deal with that at the time. And I knew I would have had trouble with an OB when I started measuring 7-10 weeks ahead near the end and with a history of big babies. They would have wanted to induce me early, no doubt in my mind. (Well, I know this because when I first found out I was pg I went to my OB/Gyn for my first visit and he was already saying he wouldn't want me going past 38 weeks. I delivered a day before my due date.)

I'm not going to say that no birth should have interventions. But from what I've heard and read, there aren't that many *real* emergencies that happen. There are care providers who make it sound like an emergency so that the mom tells everyone "they SAVED my baby!" when in reality there were other options. When I watch the birthing shows and hear the doctor tell women that their pelvis is too small when there's just no way they can tell that DURING birth and without an x-ray of the pelvic opening, and when they've not tried any other alternative position to open the pelvis, and when true cephalopelvic disproportion is very, very rare...I just get a tad angry! Then a 7 lb baby comes out. I just feel that many OB's out there want things to happen in a nice, uniform way without any veering from the course. You *have* to dilate a cm an hour, you *have* to be able to push the baby out within the first hour or so, you *have* to have this grocery list of interventions. And I get a bit angry with moms-to-be who don't take the time to read, read, READ everything about birth and the whole process...who just follow the advice of the OB without ever thinking it through themselves. I know, I know...the OB has gone to medical school! But birth is a totally natural event that we've made unnatural and fear-filled. I would want an OB if I was having a difficult birth, or a transverse breech who wasn't budging...but other than that, my body can handle it thankyouverymuch!

Enough of my ranting. I'm not totally anti-medicine. I believe doctors have their places when needed. I guess I just don't feel a normal, uneventful birth really requires a doctor's "management". So my final say on birth is GET informed, KNOW what you feel comfortable with, VOICE your concerns, DEMAND the care you want and have a great birth experience!!