WELCOME  TO  THOSE  FUNNY  KIDS
 

 

 

WHILE INTENTLY WATCHING US MAKE PORK SAUSAGE WITH A NEIGHBOR, OUR 4 YEAR OLD GRANDAUGHTER DIDNT SAY A WORD.DURING THE DRIVE HOME,HOWEVER SHE MADE AN INTERESTING OBSERVATION:"YOU SURE PUT FUNNY PANTY HOSE ON THAT SAUSAGE.
GENEVIEVE THOLE
 
 

FEELING BRAVE,MY GRANDDAUGHTER, ASKED HER MOTHER TO PIERCE HER EARS."ALL RIGHT DEAR," HER MOTHER AGREED." BUT I HAVE TO PUT ICE ON YOUR EAR LOBES SO IT WON'T HURT.
SHE GRIMACED AND SAID "OH ALL RIGHT, WOULD YOU WARM UP THE ICE FIRST ?"
 BETTY SMITH
 
 
 

HER FIRST TIME FISHING WITH A ROD AND REEL, MY GRANDDAUGHTER WAS STRUGGLING TO GET THE LINE INTO THE LAKE.TRYING TO BE HELPFUL,HER DAD CAST THE BOBBER WAY OUT OVER THE WATER. "BUT DADDY,"SHE CRIED WHEN HE HANDED THE ROD BACK,"MY EYES DON'T REACH THAT FAR!"
DELLA JUST

AFTER PLANTING OUR VEGETABLE GARDEN ALL MORNING,MY DAUGHTER,KAREN,AND I SAT DOWN TO A LUNCH OF HAMBURGERS.SHE ATE QUIETLY FOR A WHILE,AND THEN STARTED PICKING THE SESAME SEEDS OFF HER BUN,"MOM,SHE ASKED SERIOUSLY,"IF WE PLANT THESE SEEDS,WILL THEY GROW INTO HAMBURGERS ?"
CATHERN VEENENDAAL

MY THREE YEAR OLD GRANDSON WAS UNDERFOOT IN THE KITCHEN SO HIS MOTHER SENT HIM OUTSIDE TO "GIVE THE FLOWERS A DRINK",AWAY HE WENT,ONLY TO RETURN IN A MINUTE."JON,I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO GIVE THE FLOWERS A DRINK,"HIS MOM REMINDED HIM. WITH A QUICK SHRUG,HE REPLIED,"I COULDN'T FIND THEIR MOUTHS ."
MRS.BILLEYE HINES

WHEN OUR IDENTICAL TWIN DAUGHTERS WERE IN FIRST GRADE,A FRIEND WANTED TO KNOW HOW THE TEACHER COULD TELL THEM APART.
"EASY,ONE OF THEM EXPLAINED,"WE HAVE DIFFERENT NAMES!"
MRS.DONALD NELSON

BEFORE BEDTIME,MY DAUGHTER-IN-LAW ASKED HER TWO YOUNGSTERS TO CLEAN UP THEIR PLAYROOM.SOON,WE HEARD THE SOUND OF TOYS AND BOOKS BEING PUT AWAY,AND THE OLDER GIRL GIVING ORDERS TO HER YOUNGER BROTHER LIKE A FOUR-STAR GENERAL. FINALLY,MUTINY SET IN. THE LITTLE BOY CAME STOMPING INTO THE KITCHEN AND DECLARED FURIOUSLY,"SHE'S IN THERE ACTING JUST LIKE A MOTHER !"
MILDRED SHERRER

IN THE MIDST OF BREAKFAST,MY GRANDSON,3 1/2 ,PAUSED BETWEEN SPOONFULS OF OATMEAL TO ASK HIS MOTHER,"DOES GOD LIVE RIGHT HERE IN MY HEART ?" "SURE HE DOES LUKE,"SHE REPLIED LOVINGLY. "OH,HE RESPONDED. THEN HE ASKED IN A WORRIED LOOK,"WHEN I EAT MY OATS,WON'T THEY FALL ON HIS HEAD ?"
BETTY POTTS

RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF A BRISK WALK WITH ME,MY 3 YEAR OLD GRANDSON CAME TO A SUDDEN HALT.
"I HAVE TO REST FOR A MINUTE," HE INFORMED. "MY FEET RAN OUT OF BREATH!" ARDYTH VOS
A RED HOT SWEET MUST HAVE TICKLED MY GRANDDAUGHTERS TONGUE. SHE SWALLOED AND TOLD ME,"THIS CANDY MAKES MY MOUTH FEEL LIKE SUMMER!"
DORIS DAVIS

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS,OUR FAMILY WAS VISITING FRIENDS. DAUGHTER SARAH WAS EXCITED TO HEAR SOMEONE HAD SEEN EIGHT DEER IN A FIELD NEARBY. "WAS THERE A LITTLE FAT MAN WITH THEM ?" SHE ASKED HOPEFULLY.
MARTHA ARN

MY SIX YEAR OLD GRANDSON WAS TELLING ME ABOUT HIS VISIT WITH THE DENTIST. "HE HAD THIS WHITE MASK OVER HIS FACE,I GUESS HE DIDN'T WANT TO SMELL MY BREATH !"
D.CHASE

MOTHER TRIED A DIFFERENT CHICKEN RECIPE,BAKING IT WITH THE SKIN ON. LITTLE BROTHER HAD NEVER SEEN IT SERVED THAT WAY."I THINK,"HE VENTURED AFTER A LOOK AT THE BUMPY SKIN,"THIS CHICKEN MUST HAVE THE CHILLS." MRS.ARNOLD OLDENBURG

GRANDSON ADAM,6 VISITED ONE DAY AND REPORTED THE TOOTH FAIRY HAD LEFT HIM SOME MONEY UNDER HIS PILLOW. WHEN ADAM WANTED TO SEE MY TEETH,I TOOK OUT MY UPPER PLATE TO SHOW HIM.HIS EYES GREW WIDE AND HE CONFIDED,"GRANDMA,YOU COULD REALLY MAKE SOME MONEY !"
NETTIE ZOOK

I TAKE CARE OF CHILDREN IN MY HOME.ONCE A 3-YEAR OLD CAME UP TO ME AND REPORTED PROUDLY
'I FOUND A LITTLE TRASH CAN." THEN HE HANDED ME A THIMBLE.
JOYCE E. MAY

SO THEY WOULDN'T WORRY,MY DAUGHTER TRIED TO DELICATELY DESCRIBE TO HER CHILDREN WHAT GRANDMOTHER'S SURGERY WOULD BE LIKE.SHE TOLD THEM THE DOCTOR WOULD JUST CUT GRANDMA'S TUMMY THEN SEW IT RIGHT BACK UP AGAIN. SHARI,THE YOUNGEST,THOUGHT OVER THE PROCEDURE AND ASKED,'HOW IS THE DOCTOR GOING TO GET GRANDMA UNDER THE SEWING MACHINE ?"
MRS.ELI MILLER

OUR SON CAME HOME WITH A REMNANT OF THE CARPET HE'D PICKED TO COVER THE FLOORS. WHEN MY GRANDDAUGHTER ASKED WHAT IT WAS FOR,HE INFORMED HER IT WAS WALL-TO-WALL CARPETING.
SHE LOOKED AT THE LIVING ROOM,THEN BACK TO THE SAMPLE AND QUESTIONED "WHAT'S IT GOING TO DO......... GROW ?" LOUISE BREMER

JUSTIN'S GREAT-GRANDMOTHER SURPRISED HIM WITH A KISS AT A FAMILY REUNION. NOT USED TO SUCH BIG DOSES OF AFFECTION,MY SON VIGOROUSLY WIPED HIS FACE WITH HIS SHIRTSLEEVE. "ARE YOU WIPING OFF MY KISS ?" GRANNY ASKED,EYES TWINKLING.
WITHOUT HESTITATION,JUSTIN REPLIED,"I'M JUST SCATTERING IT AROUND A LITTLE ."
JODI BACH

WHEN MY FRIENDS GRANDDAUGHTER COMPLAINED OF A TUMMY ACHE,SHE TOLD THE LITTLE GIRL,"YOUR STOMACH'S PROBABLY EMPTY.....LET'S GET SOMETHING TO EAT."
LATER THAT DAY,THE MINISTER PAID A VISIT. WHEN HE MENTIONED HAVING A HEADACHE,THE CHILD ASKED SYMPATHEYICALLY,"OH,IS YOUR HEAD EMPTY ?"
PATSY SHUE

WATCHING WIDE-EYED,AS HIS FATHER BURPED HIS NEW BABY SISTER,OUR 3-YEAR OLD SON ADVISED."DON'T HIT HER TOO HARD,DAD...YOU'LL
KNOCK OUT HER BATTERIES.
BRONWYN HOGAN

AS HER GRANDMOTHER CUT CORN FROM THE COB,OUR 3-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER LOOKED CONFUSED. AFTER A WHILE ,SHE INQUIRED "GRANDMA,WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH ALL THOSE CORN BONES ?"
TERESA KEISLING

MOLLY,MY FRIENDS YOUNGEST DAUGHTER,SURPRISED ME WITH A SECRET DURING AN AFTERNOON WALK.
"DID YOU KNOW I WAS BORN WITHOUT FEET ?" SHE REVEALED. WHEN I QIZZICALLY ASKED FOR DETAILS,SHE EXPLAINED."I WAS READING MY BABY BOOK,AND ONE PAGE SAYS :'FIRST NOTICED FEET AT 6 MONTHS'."
KAREN HELBERG

MY HUSBAND,AN AVID PHOTOGRAPHER,ASKED US TO BE QUIET WHILE HE ATTEMTED TO GET THE PERFECT PICTURE OF BIRDS FEEDING OUTSIDE OUR DINING ROOM WINDOW. AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES OF SILENCE,OUR 4-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER WHISPERED IN HIS EAR."DADDY I DON'T THINK THEY'RE GONNA SMILE FOR YOU."
DEBBIE LUCE
 

 
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