My name is Heather and my husband's name is Chris. Soon after we started dating I found out I was pregnant which was a huge surprise seeming that I was told by my Dr. that I couldn't get pregnant. You see I had cervical cancer when I was 14 and they did a biopsy and froze my cervix. After that I was trying to get pregnant and had no luck so they told me that I might not be able to get pregnant. But I did on my own!!

I found out I was pregnant because I was sick in the emergency room. I went 3 nights in a row to the E.R. and they kept saying I wasn't but I had to go back a fourth night because I still felt bad and low and behold they did a blood test and I was 2 weeks pregnant. The Dr. wailed in and said "Well Heather have you ever been pregnant ?" and I said "no" and he said "well congratulations you are". I began crying. My dream had finally come true. I truly felt blessed. Chris wasn't there with me that night at the hospital but I asked the nurse for the phone and I called him and said "Hi Daddy" and he said "what" and I said" Hi Daddy" and he got real quite. and said" no way, your pregnant?" and I said "yeah I'm on my way home now " We had been blessed with a miracle!!!

I had been real sick off and on the whole pregnancy with dehydration and I kept going in and out of the hospital. Never too much morning sickness
though. I kept telling one of the Dr. that something wasn't right that I was having too many problems but nobody wanted to listen to me. I had a lot of ultrasounds and I found out really early that it was a girl. They said that she was the healthiest baby that they had seen in a long time and that I had nothing to worry about. Although she did kick me so hard one time that she ripped a muscle in my stomach. LOL. So Chris and I thought nothing of it and went on enjoying the pregnancy.

We were so happy and everyone else around us was too. We started buying her clothes and everything she would need to have the perfect little life. She was definitely "Daddy's Little Girl" every time he would come around she would kick real hard. LOL

I had an ultrasound on February 1,1999 and they confirmed that she was a
girl and told me that she was perfect. That eased our minds a lot. Then on
Thursday the fourth I started having what I thought was braxton hicks
contractions and I called my sister in law and she said that it was about
the time for those so we thought no big deal. They would come and go and
weren't very strong. I then thought it was probably just gas. She was still
moving like crazy so I thought she was alright. Chris and I decided that if I was still having the pain in the morning that I would call the Dr.. I slept throughout the night and when I woke up the pains were gone . Great I thought!! But not long after that they came back. I went in to the bathroom and I was bleeding. I knew right then what was happening. I fell to the floor crying !!! I got up and called the Dr. and they said to hurry in that I was in labor.!! I was 20 weeks and 1 day. 

By the time I got to the hospital I was already dilated 5cm. From there I don't remember much except that it all happened so fast. The Dr. told me that she wouldn't make it and that we were goanna try and push through this as quick as possible. I was in labor for about 3-4 hours. Towards the end I heard the Dr. tell everyone including Chris (we weren't married yet) to get out of the room. I was bleeding to death and my cervix had closed on her tiny neck. 

When everyone left the room there was a lot of commotion . Nobody said
anything to me. They removed the lower half of Makayla and then before I knew it I was rushed out of the room and down the hall pass my family and through the doors for surgery. I don't remember much from there because they had me so drugged but when the surgery was over they told me that I had lost well over 1,000cc of blood and was bleeding to death and the Dr. told me that my cervix shutting on Makaylas tiny neck had decapitated her ! They kept me on the baby floor so every time another baby was born I had to hear the lullaby. I was devastated. I cried for hours non stop. I complete blocked the world out and I kept wondering how did this happen to me? What did I do wrong? 

That evening the nurse had come in and asked us if we wanted to see our little angel. Of course we said yes and so she told us that they put stitches in both sides of her neck and described to us what she looked like so we wouldn't be shocked or surprised. When that nurse walked back into room with Makayla it was like the whole room just lit up. An angel had just come in....she was the most beautiful baby we had ever seen !! She had all ten fingers and all ten toes, the longest legs (like her Daddy) and long arms. She was so tiny .We didn't hold her. I knew that if I took her in my arms that I would never let her go again. We said good bye to her and told her how much we loved her and I told her I was sorry that I had failed her and that I didn't protect her from harm. I went home the next day, without my baby. Chris and I had to start planning a funeral rather than a homecoming party. I think one of the hardest things for me was when I got home all of the things that we had bought for her already was there and I had to pack it all up. I didn't want anyone else to touch her things. I had to do it on my own. The next few days were really rough. I couldn't sleep ,I wouldn't eat and finally the Dr. put me on a antidepressant .

The day of a funeral came and I was a mess. Chris
was so strong and there right beside for everything. He was my biggest
support and I couldn't have made it through this without him. The service is really a blur to me .I don't remember anything that the Rev. said. I walked up to the casket and she looking like an angel .I had bought a porcelain doll and took the dress off of it for her and made a little bow for her head. She was beautiful. Chris and I placed a picture of us right beside her little head so she would have us with her on her journey always and we but one sock that said "I love mommy" and one "Florida state" and one "University of Miami" sock that we had bought her. (the Florida Sate sock was from me and Daddy put the other sock, its a reverie with us) My sister in law placed a gold stork in the casket that said " To Makayla , we love you and miss you love Titi Joy" and my mom and sister placed a Winnie the pooh doll and flowers and Chris' parents placed a gold guardian angel with her to watch over her. Chris and I bought a baby blanket to place over her. After the burial we placed wind chimes in the tree that drapes over her grave. Now it was time to try and heal...... Chris and I were married a week after Makayla died. We knew that if we could get through something so devastating together that we could face anything life was going to throw at us.

I use to go and see her everyday because I was afraid to leave her but now we go every Sunday. Makayla is definitely spoiled !! We buy her new flowers for every holiday and decorations for her grave. She always gets something when we go shopping. That's what being "Daddy's little girl" is all about !! We miss her so much and I know that every day that goes by is another day closer until I can hold her in my arms for all eternity.

We love you Makayla!!!