me and knappy had that once - bastards went round the block and caught him (they missed me) twice in different roads

stalked by the (edward) fox in the box

Day of the Jackal, but with eggs and jimbob instead of bullets and De Gaulle. Do you think they stalked you across Europe under several assumed identities?

t h e

k e y

i s

so teh keyis, always remember to screw your lid on tightly.

there you go

i'd say it had little to do with pissing, and more to do with getting up quickly in the middle of the night.

otherwise it'd be the same whenever you piss.

maybe it just pours out from your skull cos you got up too quick.

Ok, maybe its rushes to the bladder when it contracts then.

eh? since when does blood rush to your knob when pissing?

except during watersports.

did you still have your cock out?

22/1/03 10:53
CJ

"isn't it a commn thing for men to faint while having a pee. All the blood rushes to the (important) organ and forgets to go to the brain."

This happened to me once. Not like you describe it though.
I woke up, my arm was in serious pain cause i'd slept on it. It was lifeless. I went to the toilet using my left arm. As the blood rushed back to my right arm during mid-pee, I collapsed, smashing the airing cupboard door with my head. Took my parents 15 mins to bring me back round. Funny though.

hehehehe - drive by egging

Pieguts, he realised late that the Ambassador was phaps not into spoiling him.

Yep Morgan, for midnight peeing it is advisable to men to prop themselves up cos it can be dangerous. I've known someone to faint, knock his head on the rim and loose a tooth down the bog.

*hopes for drive by waifing*

Nor have I! I'm really panicking now…

erm, no sooz. though when i get a stiffy i need to be held upright, monster it is and 8 pints cant be all places at once you know...

:o)

really sooz? I've not heard that before.

As for the ferrero roche sooz did you're mate not have the sense to open his mouth?

*hopes for drive by Jaffa Cakeing*

panic

Don't panis, gooners gonna pop round and give me bed baths…

unless she said "I wish that shady looking yid next to me would lash his love silk on my 'extra large onions'

be grateful they were not hard boiled jimbo. That's hardcore egging is that.

he he smelly jim

isn't it a commn thing for men to faint while having a pee. All the blood rushes to the (important) organ and forgets to go to the brain.

either that or the fact you've vowed never to have a bath again is becoming apparent.

Goons, 'am' is spelt 'a.m' not 'h.a.v.e'

I was just helping someone at their computer and the girl next to me muttered 'extra large onions' I panicked for a minute but I don't think it was a threat, she's cooking beef something or other…

internet shminternet

not according t'tinternet.

grapefruit - ouch !

*shops for Pineapple*

I'm still sure someone was killed by an onion not so long ago

Someone in a SUV threw a big bulb of onion at me - 10/14/2002 1:04:14 PM - VK
Message Text:
last Friday night while I was running. Luckily it missed me by about a foot. I don't get it either why someone would do such stupid and evil things. Maybe I should have picked up the onion and threw it at the SUV.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Drive by "fruitings" - 10/14/2002 8:50:27 PM - JT in AZ
Message Text:
have become sport due to all of the citrus available for the taking in the Phoenix area. I have been hit three different times now and after giving the description of the car, tag number and details of the second and third times, the Phoenix police said it was just kids having fun and did NOTHING! I even had pictures of the bruise from the grapefruit on my side!!!

hehehe! I remember when this happened to gooner!

true dial, i skipped the fainting. after all, i have a penis.

babs - the answer is no.

They're hatching a vicious upturn in gang warfare in North London.

the onion back-lash! peel their caps back!

Suckers they come a dime a dozen, and when I say dozen you know what I'm talking about, boyeeeeeee...

"--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AK - 69
hahaha, we used to do that, and also the thing where you move the windscreen water shooter to face the pavements, and squirt pedestrians thats a good un."

Don't walk too close to a train in a platform - we do that too and it squirts about 6 feet. Mmmh, soapy.

heheheheh yolk's on you!

one was an ouef, but 2 eggers?

Andy you just can't see any some else getting some sympathy without trying to hijack it.

And remember its Jim, so there is not a lot of sympathy there to start with.

Oh, but that was me by the way. I was practising before I start throwing the grenades.

Fancy getting some revenge Goons?…

*buys onions*

apart from the girly fainting

There's an eggsplosion of it!

shall we start a victim support group?

solidarity brother

Shit, serial eggers.

22/1/03 10:24
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dial Square
only you jimbob, only you

er, not true unfortunately.

if you remember, i produced an almost identical thread about a year ago.

how about throwing a brick?
thats the boy

i'm gonna try that tonight PWX

Staying in bed for the rest of my life Morgan

Wood green: Ricin, turkish terrorists, drive by eggers.

the streets just aren't safe anymore…

pickled eggs, mmmmmmmmmmmmm, lush with loads of pepper

London Inn Drive-in Onion Rings

4 jumbo onions
3 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 egg
3 teaspoons Lawry's seasoned salt
1 teaspoon celery salt
1 teaspoon garlic salt
1 teaspoon onion salt
1 pint milk

Peel and slice onions into 1/2 inch thickness. Pop out centers and rings. Put all batter ingredients in mixer bowl and blend thoroughly. [Batter is thicker than pancake mix.] Coat onion slices well. Fry rings until golden brown, salt with Lawry's seasoned salt.

Source: Huck Andresen

if the egg had hit me on the head with its pointy end, it could have killed me.

in a strange twist, i bought myself a cream egg last night, and managed to crushed it in my bag, horrible sticky mess.

drive-by onioning. Marvellous.

It was probably that juju hitman on Watchdog last night.

it's a jar. that would hurt, clearly.

or a jar of pickled eggs

one large onion

So you're staying in your office forever?

What would hurt more? One large onion or 10 challots?

I'm never having a bath or going out side again.

They may have been a good shot, it was the luck of the duck (bending down to pick something up) that made them miis i think.

I swear it's true has anyone heard of this?

What a way to go - killed by a drive by onion!! hehehehe

i just had a really hot bath!

*faints*

you're = your

You know when you're teacher was really angry at you in school but you'd done something that was so funny that you were laughing in his face and shitting in your pants at the same time. Well that's how I feel about Jim, me and this thread.

If you stand up too quickly from a very hot bath it does make you dizzy. Really hot baths are bad for you anyway.

hehehe dial, jim will be having nightmares

hahahaa dial, expletive off an onion!!

well, the nobbly bits of nuts could have caused some damage Jim, but he didn't report it to the police funnily enough. Dressed in a wig, short skirt and suspenders & heels he kinda felt a twat.

hahaha, we used to do that, and also the thing where you move the windscreen water shooter to face the pavements, and squirt pedestrians thats a good un.

so they weren't a very good shot?

wasn't there a story a while ago about some lads who threw an onion at someone from a car and killed them?

join us next week when Jim explains how yesteryears apple scrumping was so much more fun than todays putting lighted bangers up a cats arse

*knits radiator cozy for jim*

thats a waste of decent chocolate sooz……

or kinky

(maybe Dial) ;O)

Don't know Viks. Not when i got egged i didin't anyway.

We used to do it too, so what goes around comes around… But doing it from a car to people on foot is very poor.

were you stoned as well?

hahahha my mate was a victim of a Drive-By Ferrero Roche thrower. Mind you he was dressed up as a women at the time.

imagine the shame; naked, as the striking firemen broke in to save you ;-)

hehehe - drive by egging!! My husband told me he used to do that when he was younger. Little shit!

Sounds like you fainted honey. Getting all steamed up! Do you have low blood pressure?

:OI

*tries not to laff*

*points*

*laughs*

only you jimbob, only you

Little expletiveers.

Walking down the road, droppped something, bent over and as i did some shits drove by in a car and threw an egg at me!… then drove of laughing. Luckily, it only clipped my sleeve

expletiveing wusses, at least when we went egging we did it on foot and threw them at cars…

Also, i think i passed out on friday, in the bathroom. Wasn't drunk, just had a very hot bath and had a dizzy spell when i got out that didn't seem to finish, next thing i know i woke up on the bathroom floor, the side of my head hurts a bit and i burnt my foot on the radiator pipe…