The Symbol Department of the Experimental and Theoretical Applications of Poultry Science and Astrobiology
Central Intelligence Agency

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Welcome to my very own slice of greatness. This website has not been updated in the last several months, and some problems with navigating around it may still exist. Sorry. Nevertheless, the fact remains that this site is one of high quality and it should not be overlooked merely because it appears to be highly lame, despite the all new, professional-looking format.

This page basically exists because I feel the need to fill something with words like boobs, suck, nudity, and the like to shamelessly gain hits on my web counter from perverts into free internet porn and anal probes. If you're one of those people . . . you're probably pretty disappointed right now.

Brand Spankin' New Additions to The Department:

  • ESPN NewsWire!
  • Shameless Use of the word "Porn"!
  • No More Annoying Frames and Graphic Linkage Icons!

Coming Soon to The Department:

  • Intrigue, My very own Interactive, Virtual Reality Online Web Game!
  • The Movie Quote Gallery!
  • An Official Index of Porn Sites Across the Web!
  • A Tribute to the Porsche Boxster, Quite Possibly the Most Beautiful Automotive Expression of All Time!
  • An Up-to-Date B.I. of the Month Index!

ESPN NewsWire
Last Updated: 21 April 1999 by The Neon Samurai
You are visitor number to visit this site since 23 October 1998.

This site is not affiliated with The Central Intelligence Agency in any way, shape, or form. If they saw this they'd probably be very concerned to know that I've wanted to join the CIA for years and this is all I'm capable of. Thank you. Also, there will never be porn on this site. It's all a joke.