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The head of the U.S. Senate, and arguably the whitest man in America, Trent Lott has been skating his responsibilities to the American people lately. Not because of any well-placed vote or lack thereof, but because he's been avoiding getting attached to a nickname we can all be proud if. Millennium 101 plans to change that, with your help. The table below provides information to help you better understand Senator Lott. There are quotes and actions performed over the last year that undoubtably let the American people know where he stands, and we've got most of them. In each instance, Millennium 101 provides a "suggested" nickname, depending on the circumstance(s). Please take the time to fill in the form at the bottom of the page with your favorite nickname for our senatorial leader.
It's Your TurnClick HERE to enter your own favorite nickname suggestion. (NOTE: The form requires a browser with Javascript.) Remember to check back soon; the most popular nicknames will be displayed in the near future.
Related stories: The Devil Inside
More satire: Advice for Young Doctors
Copyright © June 1999 by Mark Morton. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed in any form without contract or permission, but is for sale. Contact Mark Morton if you wish to publish this story in your magazine or short story compilation. You are visitor number |
About the Capital Gains Nightmare of the '80'sPresident Reagan introduced a tax plan in the early '80's that many experts dubbed "voodoo economics" because it proposed enormous tax cuts to corporations, reducing the tax burden from 50 down to 15 per cent. Financial experts disagreed with the plan across the board, because it was the equivalent of giving away billions of tax dollars necessary for running the country. Reagan's plan was simple: if we give corporations more money to work with, they'll grow even larger, and this growth will create more jobs, and even more tax income. The very definition of "trickle-down" politics also called "supply-side economics." The problem with his plan is that it didn't account for a critical human character trait: Greed.What happened next Corporations across America instantly had millions -- and in some cases, billions of dollars at their disposal. So they started spending it -- by buying up smaller businesses and merging with others. Millionaires were literally created overnight with these deals. In the news, these mergers made it seem like Reagan's plan was a godsend, that Americans were becoming wealthier across the board. Want proof? Just look at all the new millionaires in our land of opportunity. Less than a year after the tax plan was introduced, working Americans started paying the real price for it. Reality sets in The new business paradigm for the '80's: Fire your employees to make more money. When businesses merged or bought out others, they fired lots of people -- partly to keep the executives wealthy, partly because the deals often happened so fast, no real financial planning was involved (in other words, poor management). The larger and richer the merger/buyout, the more people that were fired. The greatest side effect of the "voodoo economics" plan was the millions of Americans left without employment when these corporations started spending their newfound windfalls. This placed an enormous burden on federal and state welfare and unemployment plans as they scrambled to pick up the pieces. Ironically, Reagan's plan also cut state funding and eliminated many programs for the poor. In the end, America was left with a trillion-dollar deficit and the highest unemployment rate since the forties, over 10%. This also created the beginning of the homeless problem that still plagues America; a problem that Reagan's plan exacerbated, and most GOP members continue to ignore. The Big Picture It's the late 1990's, over 15 years since the capital gains nightmare first started. It took President Clinton 2 terms and numerous battles with a GOP-run Congress and Senate to get our debt under control to the point in which we finally have a projected surplus. The GOP wants to spend it, thereby ignoring the lessons we learned from the past.
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