With all due apologies to Coolio...

Debata's Paradise

The LD version

As I walk through the hallways in the shadow of Nats
I take a look at my case and realize there's not much left
Cause I been reading Theory of Justice so long
That even the interpers think that my mind is gone
But I ain't never crossed an NC that didn't deserve it
Need be spewin' 1AR, you know that's unheard of
But ya better watch how you're preppin', and how you're flowin'
Or you and your teammates be observin' at Nats
I missed Contention III so I gotta spread
As they vote I see myself in the final round, fool
I am the LDer little novice wanna be like
Looking for that quote cite, in the library in the late night

Been spendin' most our lives, philosophy is a debata's paradise

Forget about the real world, they got me LDing
I could live a normal life, but the tournaments are on weekends
So I gotta be down with the policy team
Too much philosophizing got me chasin' dreams
I'm an educated fool with TOC on my mind
Got my Kant in my hand and a gleam in my eye
I'm a low down spreadin' flow sharin' debata'
And my homies are down 3 don't arouse my anger, fool
Next loss ain't nuthin' but a lay judge away
I'm debating individual versus community, what can I say?
I'm 3 and 2 now, will I live to see double-octs
The way I'm debatin' I don't know

Tell me why are we
So blind to see
That the seeds to beat
Are 2 and 3

Liberty over safety, safety over liberty
Minute after minute, hour after hour
Everybody's spewin', but half of them ain't flowin'
What's up with new arguments in 2AR
But I dunno what's winnin'

They say I gotta have a value but nobody's there to teach me
If they can't understand criteria how can they reach me?
I guess they can't, I guess they won't, I guess I'll spew
That's when I know my case is out of luck, fool

These pages maintained by Catherine Bernard. All material contained within is her original work and should not be reproduced without her permission. You can email her at
debatechick@geocities.com.