8.3.01

Ohmymy... This is what a tradeshow will do for you. Apart from completely fucking up your life and making you miss posting to your blog, they make you do strange things.

But then again, this has been the week of strange things... Most notably, the fact that I have a hood ornament, I discovered the antithesis of "You Are Here" and I could be working in another place, and ditching my life as I know it.

Next thing you know I will be strutting around like this in an airport proclaiming the benovolence of Hare Krishna
.

- 16:20

30.1.01

Well, I am on my way to the land of Almost-Cuba, Miami. Maybe there will be updates. Maybe not. Don't hold your breath. :)
- 08:43

27.1.01

On to the amusing stuff!

Marketing Understatement of the Year

- 00:25

26.1.01

I was pondering the senses tonight because my windshield had iced over and driving blind as a bat.

Question: Which of your senses would you lose if you had to choose?

Hearing would be an important one for me because my focus is on languages and I need to be able to hear myself speak so that I can interpret, etc. I would miss my Led Zep on vinyl, my Enigma on CD, and my own voice in the shower too much.

Sight would be a must because I love to drive. It is my therapy. *Honestly* The smell of exhaust and the whistle of the open road through the vents is like popcorn for the soul for me. I also enjoy sunsets, moonrises, kaleidascopes, plaid and stars too much.

I think that the combination of smell/taste I could live without. After all, if everything tastes like everything else, dieting would be a snap because there would be no gustatative or olfactory reward for eating Haagen Daz over Haggas. It would make me a better person because I would

1. Clean out the catbox more
2. Wash my dishes more regularly
3. Use a timer when I cook
4. Buy the good, eco-friendly, non-remarkable smelling washing detergent for my laundry instead of the cheap fragranced stuff
5. And so on...

This might be a good thing.
- 23:15

That last post about being just overjoyed that it was quitting time and the frequency of posts on my job has clued me in to several things.

1. I really need to get a new job.
2. Said job should be hourly
3. Said job should have as little to do with my current job as possible

I think I also stunbled upon to one of the greater truths of Workdom:

Salaried people have no lives.

I say this now because it is Friday, I really should be sewing curtains for our tradeshow. I am not. I do not want to. This is my personal time. Time to be with my family, as four-footed as they may be. Time to work on my house and personal projects. Time to spend with friends. Which brings me to another thought:

Single people with no lives automatically assume that you have no life either.

Sales Guy and The Boss are single and are not in very well with their families. I am just getting my relationship to "Better than Workable" level and I don't really see my S.O. very much due to that whole first shift/second shift time split. So I do miss my furry family and Honey.

The question of being on salary does make me wonder where the delineation between my time and work time comes in. Just when is my time, my time? Where do my salaried obligations end? Should I be the first one there and the last one to leave because I should? Do I owe them their fourty and after that, it's my time? Such big questions.
- 23:02

Your attention please:

IT'S FRIDAY! IT'S QUITTING TIME!
YEE-HAW!

That is all. You may go about your business now.
- 18:06

Apparently some White House staffers from the Clinton administration decided to pull some pranks - some rather exciting, including prying off all of the "W" keys off of the keyboards. According to the your favorite news and slander site, the Drudge Report:

• Computer printers that were filled with blank paper but interspersed with pornographic pictures and obscene slogans that would be revealed only as items were run off the computer.
• 'W' keys weren't just pried off more than 40 keyboards, some were glued on with Superglue; some were turned upside down and glued on.
• Filing cabinets glued shut.
• VP Office space in the Old Executive Office Building found in complete shambles. Mrs. Gore had to phone Mrs. Cheney to apologize, first reported by Rich Galen's Mullings.
• Lewd MagicMarker graffiti found on one office hallway.

I actually consider this a better use of my tax dollars. :)

- 12:49

Refresh my memory again, WHY?

"Hey Cheney, pull my finger! No, really! Pull my finger!"

- 09:02

25.1.01

We had Virus Protection installed on our work computers today. Such excitement! However, I have this little nagging thought creeping up in the back of my mind about *why* we did so.

About a month ago, the Sales Guy's computer took the big dumper and was rendered inoperable. At that time, the computer guy had mentioned that we might want to get virus software because "You never know when you're going to get a worm or virus."

Well Lo and be-fawking-hold if the Sales Guy doesn't get a worm and the same guy who worked on his computer has to come in and clean out his hard-drive.

I should just knock it off to odd coincidence, but I can't. The time that the worm has been on the comp and the time that he had the new computer are just tooooooo much the same.
- 16:37

Bruja say: Virginity is like large pretty balloon: One prick and all gone.
- 10:36

One of my more favorite websites Slashdot.org was on The Connection on a program talking about The Self-Organized Web that I missed.

Actually, I got about 15%, but a religious station that has multiple stations strewn about on the Public Radio side of the dial was bleeding over onto the Public Radio station and talked over a good deal of it. I honestly *want to know* about the Net, not my salvation. :P

I am extremely snarfed off that my commute now encompasses an WPR/NPR dead-zone, thanks to the addition of that religious station so close on the dial. I can get a bit of Sheboygam, Green Bay, and Milwaukee, but there isn't an WPR station in Fond du Lac. It's enough to make me want to start my own or crab at someone to get one. :)
- 10:03

And here's a tip from CNN for porn stars in Smurf costumes that appear to be dead when they took too many pills to relax:

"People have to understand that cold, stiff, blue people can be resuscitated."

- 09:44

24.1.01

Lots of picturing people naked today and yesterday. :P The tradeshow booth saga continues.

And in a sidebar, I found out that my boss, as old as he is, has a huge collection of Britney Spears videos on his harddrive.

Bruja say: Foolish Man give wife Grand Piano; Wise Man give wife Upright Organ.
- 11:17

22.1.01

I had one of those cosmic harmony moments on the ride to work today where you realize that all is good and all is right - the soft pastel landscape of pinks, purples, and blues framed the white-white of the snow and the stark blacks of naked trees and hard angles of barns, silos, houses and outbuildings, while the road took on an impressive gold sheen, and Led Zep's Bron-Y-Aur was on the CD player. It was one of those moments where, despite the fact that the bills are piling up, the job sucks, and a lot of other shitty things are lying in wait, you feel pretty good about life and realize that the only limitations in life you stick there yourself.
- 10:25

So we are all here today. We survived the ascent to the throne of George II. Now we just have to survive the next four years, or until someone gets the idea to usher him into the next realm of existence. (Although it is my heartfelt desire that George not be in office, I hardly advocate capping, erasing, or deleting the president.)

So what's up on the agenda for George? Something humanitarian? Something thoughtful? Something that promotes education and better life decisions? Probably not. Especially if you are a foreign agency that offers abortions and receives monetary help from Uncle Sam.
- 10:13

Napster. The name that makes RIAA people cringe. The program that freeloaders everywhere (myself included) cheer for. The ideology that makes people question, "Just how far do our consumer rights go?" and "Where do use rights end?". Another interesting point comes from Tom the Dancing Bug.
- 10:10

21.1.01

Nothing like hitting the post button twice and then having to think of something intelligent to fill up a post. Talk about a total brain flame out. :)
- 04:26

So I am on my way to a brand spankin' new website. I registered bruja-buena.org not too long ago. Wheee! Just need a place to park the stinker. We'll get to that later. But in the mean time, a celebration and thanks out to Blue Domino for cheap ass legitimate registration.
- 04:26

Since I have been travelin' around, things have been kinda sparse. I went to Madison yesterday & met with some of the people that are on a mailing list that I am on. Even though I know some people, it's still a fun time seeing how everyone has changed and what else is new.

I even got to tempt Kyril with a golden apple. I told her if it worked for the snake, it might work for me. :9

And check this out!

bruja-buena.org processed with order # 1826759.
- 04:12

Here is a *disturbing* thought:

Right now, Laura and Dubya are probably having a celebratory romp in the White House to christen it.

Yes, I am a sick puppy.
- 03:17

18.1.01

Handy Work Relations Tip #64:

If your co-workers are really pissed off at you and you really want to yell at them while they are yelling at you, try picturing them having sex. If that doesn't work, picture them having sex with the boss, the UPS carrier, using large sex toys, or wearing outfits. Hint: Try not to laugh too hard.

- 12:31

Don't you just love Upbeat "We're Fawked" letters? I do.
- 11:23

Another "So why I am still working here?" article on tech jobs and the gender pay gap. Methinks it's time to go back to school and embrace all things geek.
- 10:28

Peeve: Retailers that are featuring their spring line of clothes and got rid of the boots around Christmas. It's JANUARY! I repeat,

JAN-YOOOOOOOOOOOU-AIR-REEEEEEEEEE!

January in Wisconsin is cold! There is snow! There is ice! The beaches are frozen! What the fawk do I need shorts for NOW? Could somebody please tell me the marketing logic of this?

And it's not just here in Wisconsin, where it is not Spring until about June. My cousin in LA also noticed this phenomenon too:

Another "Oh, you wanted winter items in winter!?!?" moment was at Casual Male the other day. Saw a nice suede vest I'd love to have. Since it is part of their fall/winter line they no longer ship them out to the stores. What are they carrying now? Spring. WTF!?!?!? I know this is SoCal but com'on people!

- 10:13

More about jobs:

"Where else could I actually get paid to listen to a reptile handler tell me that he was just bitten by a Burmese green python, right after being attacked by a Komodo dragon? My recommendation to him: 'It's not your day. Go home early. And swing by the emergency room on your way, eh?'"

From "So Ya Wanna Be a Toxicologist, Eh?"

I think I am in the wrong field.
- 10:03

15.1.01

I am happy that my job is not listed here. Although I am thinking a lot of these jobs could be lateral moves.
- 19:52

I don't mind salespeople who can understand that I don't want their services. It's part of my job to deal with them selling all matter of services: advertising, space at trade shows, services for publicity and other goodies. Some of them are decent and accept the fact that you don't want their services. Others are pushy. This I do not like.

I do not like smarmy sales people; the ones that act like they are friends, the ones trick you into using their goods and sock you with a bill, and the ones that get pissed off when you see through their ruse.

I got a call from one of them last week that was urgently pressing his services that we do not need. I told him that we were not interested. He didn't care for my indifference and the fact that I didn't care to use his services. So he bitched to my boss that I was unprofessional. Jerk.
- 19:42

I might mention that this site is way cooler in Opera. Opera is a easy-to-run browser that doesn't eat up your system's resources. It costs $US 30, but believe me, it's worth it.

I also found someone who is wondering Why Are You Here? on the web. I ask myself that a lot.
- 19:33

The most interesting thing about working in a business that owes 70% of its workforce to nepotism is that when there is a death in the family, one could practically dance around naked in the office because nobody is there.
- 09:27

14.1.01

Yesterday I met with friends at the usual time and places... We were talking about the radical notion of a minority non-Christian religion suing Christianity for anti-trust because it is unfairly bundled with the US Government and it has just an outrageous marketshare. I want to hire the lawyer of Sun and Steve Jobs. It makes me wonder what Christianity would be broken into... Ponder that.

And, of course, this just sent us into peels of laughter and crass religious comments all around.

My favorite one had to be "Can you feel the Power of Jesus?" "Yeah! His hand is on my thigh!" Rude rude rude. We're all going to burn.

This was Wisconsin before Christmas. We have had 45 inches of snow thus far. I am really wanting to move to LA, even though it is sleazy and souless, plastic and uncaring.
- 15:23

12.1.01

I am making changes to the look & feel of the site... Yippee.

Did you hear about the Time Warner & AOL merger? It's all over the place. And, of course, there are naming issues.

Will it be America OnTime? Time Warner AOL Turner, or TWAT, for short? America on Warners? (We're the Warner Brothers! And the Warner Sister!)

What will they think of next? Microsoft and Starbucks?

Ooops... we're already there.
- 17:52

11.1.01

Welcome to You are Here. A Map to where I am, where I have gone, where I am going. Links, dialog, snippets, brain lint and more.
- 10:56