The entire family was invited to sunny Santa Barbara to attend the graduation of Mary Hudson, the red-headed grain eating student from Goleta. What a surprise to all that Mary, the "graduate", who walked through with the other "graduates", actually has three more classes to complete her degree. I have thought long and hard about this. I have walked along mountain tops, surfed in hurricanes, climbed atop the vatican, done flips off the Washington Monument. I have written essays, explaining the political forces which diverge our society. Yet, with all I know, (and it is substantial), I can't see what we celebrated this past weekend. I feel that one must fulfill a dream before drinking from the champagne glass. So the checks do come in the mail, with hearty congratulations from all. As the older brother of Mary, and her mentor, I believe her impending trip abroad should be postponed We cannot give Mary the perception tha almost is alright. We must ingrain in her the will to succeed, to never relax for air until the goal is met. This is how I live my life, and what I expect from those who wish to follow the path which I have so carefully paved. So Mary, unpack your bags, apply to summer school and complete your dream. This is the time to accept responsibility, and make an investment in yourself. Be strong, redhead, goforth only when thou is prepared.
The youngest, and possibly whitest, of our clan, has begun to drive. It is true that she has driven the Sable and the Honda, but today she ventured into yet uncharted territory. Elizabeth Ann Hudson sat behind the wheel of the Hyundai, the pioneer in the automotive industry. Liz was apprehensive, but the person she respects and sdmires most, Robert Francis Hudson, tutored her admirably. Liz struggled under the tutelage of James Hudson, the cranky patriarch who could only say "clutch! Gas!" to the frazzled young lady. After only a few minutes under the eye of RFH, she was on the road, honking her horn and cutting people off. She enjoyed the experience so much that Rob offered her the Hyundai in exchange for the Honda. For unknown reasons, she rejected the offer, leaving the author flabbergasted.
After a pleasant meal with his youngest and most succesful son, James P. Hudson challenged him to a game of 21. To put this in perspective, this is like Liz fighting Tyson, Mary facing Mantle. The suave, handsome son accepted the challenge, if only to raise the spirits of the senile father. After thoroughly crushing the white-haired set-shooter in two games, a miracle occured. Three stray dogs, could they have been wise men?,appeared from nowhere. The animal loving accountant was beside himself. He could not believe that the dogs were roaming the streets with no one to care for them. Then, unexpectedly, an older woman, dog on her leash, appeared as had the wise dogs. She could see the concern on the face of the one time Rheingold employee. She yelled the number of the owner, and James rushed inside and made the life-saving call. Although James mad the quick assumption that the owner disliked the dogs, he felt that he had done an incredible deed. As we tried to continue our game,the old lady would not be quiet, she just kept rambling. Suddenly a change came over the good-hearted beer drinker. He was attempting to shoot, yet the woman would not stop talking. James, under his breath muttered, "don't talk to me while I'm shooting." Even with the uncalled for remark, James felt he had done a good deed, and it appears that he had. The next game, james buried his free throws, cruising to a stunning upset. To save face, rob went on an incredible run in the final game, just to show his father that his win was a gift from god, nothing more. As the game ended, James flung a behind the head shot from way out into the hoop, god was watching, he had to be.
That is all in this edition. We regret that no article was written on Mom. She continues her activities with meals on wheels and remains an inspiration to us all. We did not get her on the hoop court. She mumbled something about playing, but became so engrossed in Oprah-Sally-Phil that she could only leave her chair to use the toilet and answer the phone.