Chapter IV
(The following is a collection of 'nits & grits' which have come from a wide range of sources. - the originator is referenced if known. They are in no particular order other then the way they show up out of my shoe-box.)
"The closest helping hand, is the one at the end of your arm..." - R.L. Davis (father)
"When in danger or in doubt,Run in circles, scream and shout.." - Paul G. Davis (uncle)
"The most merciful thing in the world...is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents." - H.P. Lovecraft
"When choosing between two evils I always like to take the one I've never tried before." - Mae West
"Then felt I like some watcher of the skies when a new planet swims into his ken." - Keats (on Chapman's Homer)
"The rich will do anything for the poor but get off their backs." - Karl Marx
"If you think the United States has stood still, who built the largest shopping center in the world?" - Richard M. Nixon
"When I sell liquor, it is called bootlegging; when my patrons serve it on Lake Shore Drive, it's called hospitality." - Al Capone
"Yestereve, on the marble steps of the Temple, I saw a woman sitting between two men. One side of her face was pale, the other was blushing." - Kahlil Gibran
"Anything anybody can say about America is true." - Emmett Grogan
"If you've seen one city slum, you've seen them all." - Spiro Agnew
"If you've seen one redwood, you've seen them all." - Ronald Reagan
"He who shits on the road will meet flies on his return." - South African Saying
"I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce." - J. Edgar Hoover
"Don't let your mouth write no check that your tail can't cash." - Bo Diddley
"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may be another profound truth." - Niels Bohr.
"Every man knows the smell of his own fart." - Confucious
"I never loved another person the way I loved myself." - Mae West
"Paradise is just like where you are right now, only much better." - Laurie Anderson
"Nothing is true. Everything is permitted." - Hassan I. Sabbah
"Use it up...Wear it out. Make it do...Or do without." - US World War II message
"You can't underestimate the power of fear." -Tricia Nixon
"The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun." - Buckminster Fuller
"Things are more like they are now than they ever were before... " - Dwight D. Eisenhower
"You smash it...and I'll build around it." -John Lennon
"College isn't the place to go for ideas." - Hellen Keller
"Politicians should read Science Fiction, not Westerns and Detective Stories." - Arthur C. Clark
"It is necessary for me to establish a winner image. Therefore, I have to beat somebody." - Richard M. Nixon
"Any smoothly functioning technology will have the appearance of Magic." Arthur C. Clark
"Justice is incidental to law and order" - J. Edgar Hoover
"Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms." - Groucho Marx
"The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it. - Abbie Hoffman
"Here I am, fifty-eight, and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up." - Peter Drucker
"I am sixty-five, and I never had to grow up." - Paul G. Davis (Uncle)
"How can you be two places at once when you're not anywhere at all?"
- Firesign Theater
"I think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability."
- Oscar Wilde
"We are what we pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
- Oscar Wilde
"My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind." - Albert Einstein
"Real wealth can only increase." -Buckmaster Fuller
"Last night I invented a new pleasure, and as I was giving it the first trial an angel and a devil came rushing toward my house. They met at my door and fought with each other over my newly created pleasure; the one crying, 'It is a sin!' - the other, 'It is a virtue!'" - Kahlil Gibran
"Anyone can hate. It costs to love." - John Williamson
"In the province of the mind, what one believes to be true either is true or becomes true." - John Lilly
"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible." - Albert Einstein
"Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it."
- Tallulah Bankhead
"It was always thus; and even if 'twere not,' 'twould' inevitabley have been always thus." - Dean Lattimer
"Burnt Sienna. That's the best thing that ever happened to Crayolas."
- Ken Weaver
"We don't know who discovered water, but we are certain it wasn't a fish." - John Culkin
"America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between." Oscar Wilde
"If the aborigine drafted an IQ test, all of Western civilization would presumably flunk it." - Stanly Garn
"Sure there are dishonest men in local government. But there are dishonest men in National government too..." - Richard M. Nixon
"We are going to have peace even if we have to fight for it."
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
"If we make peaceful revolution impossible, we make violent revolution inevitable." - John F. Kennedy
"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "If it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic."
- Lewis Carrol
"It takes a long time to understand nothing." - Edward Dahlberg
"Eeny Meeny, Jelly Beanie, the spirits are about to speak."
- Bullwinkle Moose
"The mistake you make is in trying to figure it out."
- Tennessee Williams
"An object never serves the same function as its image, or its name."
- Rene Magritte
"All I kin say is when you finds yo'self wanderin' in a peach orchard, ya don't go lookin' for rutabagas." Kingfish
"He who wonders discovers that this in itself is a wonder."
- M. C. Escher
"When more and more people are thrown out of work, unemployment results." - Calvin Coolidge
"The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts." - R.L. Davis
"If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z; where X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut." - Albert Einstein
"Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either." - Joseph Fischer
"The meek shall inherit the earth, but not its mineral rights."
- J. Paul Getty
"The man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest." - Thoreau
"Tell a man that there are 300 billion stars in the universe, and he'll believe you...Tell him that a bench has wet paint upon it and he'll have to touch it to be sure." - ANON
"Discovery consists in seeing what everyone else has seen and thinking what no one else has thought." - Albert Szent-Gyorgi
"Civilization is a movement, not a condition; it is a voyage, not a harbor." - Toynbee
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Walt Kelly
"There are things that are so serious that you can only joke about them."
- Heisenberg
"If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost." - Unknown
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler."
- Albert Einstein
"How often I found where I should be going only by setting out for somewhere else." - R Buckminster Fuller
"I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called 'brightness,' but it doesn't work." - Gallager
"Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark." - Robert Heinlein
"None of the errors was found."- 'Compiler Message', Micro Data Base Systems
"...if it is a Miracle, any sort of evidence will answer, but if it is a fact, proof is necessary." - Samual Clemens
"In India, 'cold weather' is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door-knob and weather which will only make it mushy." -Mark Twain
"We are getting into semantics again. If we use words, there is a very grave danger they will be misinterpreted." - H. R. Haldeman, (Testifying in own defense)
"Dawn: The time when men of reason go to bed. Certain old men prefer to rise at about that time, taking a cold bath and a long walk with an empty stomach, and otherwise mortifying the flesh. They then point with pride to these practices as the cause of their sturdy health and ripe years; the truth being that they are hearty and old, not because of their habits, but in spite of them. The reason we find only robust persons doing this thing is that it has killed all the others who have tried it." - Unknown
("Gems" such as the following, surround us in our everyday existence if we just notice them - of course, the most common area for them to be discovered are, amidst all the 'garbage,' is on the walls of public restrooms...SLD)
GRAFFITI
"There is no tyranny in the state of confusion..."
"No girdle ever cured a pregnancy..."
"Freedom defined is freedom denied..."
"Egotism is the drug the soothes the pain of stupidity..."
"Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock..."
"If Karl Marx, instead of writing alot about capital, had made a lot of it, the world would have been much better off."
"The whole earth is in a jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak."
"Time is an illusion perpetrated by the manufactures of space..."
"I use'd to be indecisive; now I'm not sure..."
"Sanity is the figment of some Psychiatrist's imagination..."
"I'd give my right arm to be
ambidextrous..."
A Few Golden Thoughts
I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American.
I am George Carlin.
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some
midlevel governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies.
I'm not in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, d@mn it!
I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang.
I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer.
I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.
I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you'd better do it in English.
I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions.
I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.
I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy a$$ through 4-7 years of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God.
Hillary Clinton is a carpet-munching lesbian.
My heroes are John Wayne, the Simpsons, and whoever canceled Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.
I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I am freezing my a$$ through a long winter?
I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt, I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut-the-#$%!-up already.
I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money. And why is he always part of the problem and not the solution.
I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry a$$ if you're running from them.
I also think they have the right to pull your a$$ over if you are
breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.
I hate those b@st@rds standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making 'donations' to their cause. These people should be targets.
I think if you are in the passing lane, and not passing, your license should be revoked, and you should be forced to ride the bus until you promise to never delay the rest of us again.
I think beef jerky could quite possibly be the perfect food.
I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.
I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement.
I think Dr. Seuss was a genius.
I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.
I believe if she has her lips on your Willie, it is sex, and it is sex for both of you. This even applies when you are President of the United States.
If that makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American
If you too are a BAD American please forward this to everyone you know.
We need our country back!
End of Chapter IV
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