INOFFENSISH

There are several versions of Frogguy's Inoffensish floating about the net, and I forgot where this one comes from. The story is that in 1992, to commemorate the 500th anniversary of the discovery of America by Columbus, someone launched a competition: design Inoffensish, an artificial language such that it is impossible to offend anyone when using it. Here is Frogguy's Inoffensish... well, he still managed to be offensive in it! Can you find where?

  1. No sentence shall be allowed that does not start with: "It is disputed..."
  2. For stylistic variety, "disputed" may be replaced by: a moot point, under scrutiny, a matter that calls for further research, et al.
  3. No member of a set shall be referred to without reference to other members of that set, in the approved form: "perhaps... or possibly some other...."
  4. Thus "Columbus" becomes, in Inoffensish: "perhaps Columbus or possibly some other navigator".
  5. No set shall be referred to except through a member of itself, rule 3 applying. Thus "native Americans": "perhaps certain person born in America or possibly others born elsewhere".
  6. Beliefs, theories, and opinions shall be mentioned only by reference to those who hold them, rule 3 applying. Thus "Christianity" may only be mentioned by reference to a particular christian, e.g. after the application of rule 3: "perhaps Father Maricon y Cojones or possibly some other member of a religious order".
Now for a complete example: "It is a matter that calls for further research that perhaps in 1492 or possibly at some other date, perhaps Columbus or some other navigator discovered perhaps America or possibly some other continent, and brought perhaps Father Maricon y Cojones or some other member of a religious order to perhaps certain person born in that selfsame continent or possibly other persons born elsewhere."
Created: 7 /1 /1998 Updated: 1/8/98