You know you are a recluse from internet culture if...

You dislike the X-Files
The music you listen to is older than you
Nowhere do you make mention of Star Trek
You admit to spending way too much time on the internet and want to reduce it
You believe in the establishment
You wonder if the only way to communicate feelings is with an unfeeling :)
You think Ally McBeal is neither funny, nor a comedy
You believe censorship is a good thing
You want to make multiple obscene gestures when somebody mentions 'netiquette'
You like to offend as many people on the internet as possible
You don't care if people see your web page or not
The best show you saw all year was the Westminster Kennel Club
You can see both sides of an issue
You can't stand abreviations such as LOL, TIA, and BTW
You want people to put as few pictures, frames and tables on their web pages as possible
You know that you are the intellectual superior of almost everybody on the internet
You want the internet to be a place purely for research
You do not advocate any cause
You could care less about what people you don't know say
Your ultimate dream is being without net access