TO BUDDY'S PAGE

The life of a dog from his own point of view!

This is a recent picture of me, just so that you can see how handsome I am.
I am a one of a kind dog. Nobody has lifted the secret of my heritage yet. Feel free to e-mail me, if you think you have seen any others like me.
I am going to be 3 years old ( human years, that is) on the 4th of July. I chose that date, since nobody knows the real day of my birth, because I love parades and noises.
Oh, the smell of hotdogs, all the friendly people, the wonderful children who drop their food, and the occasional dog bisquit that people in the parade pull out of their pockets!!!!

Well, enough dreaming about the good times for now. I am here to tell you about my life. So far I have found it rather amusing. Lately, however, things are getting a bit more serious. It seems that the people I live with are a bit on the edge. Let me tell you about how I came to live with them and the kind of adventures I have had.

CHAPTER 1

COMING HOME

It is September 1997. I am 4 1/2 months old. My deed for the day was to chew through my lead with which those strange people took me away from my mother and siblings. Oh, they are nice enough, but I would rather go home.
HOME! I wonder where that is? I have been walking for quite a while now and my feet are getting pretty tired. There is a hungry feeling in my tummy, too. Those people gave me some dry, crunchy stuff to eat this morning. It sure didn't taste anything like the puppy food that my mother's owner gave us every day.
I have been sniffing up and down, left and right, there are some pretty good smells here. But where is my family?
I think I am lost.
I never want to have an owner or another leash, I think I will just look for some grub right here in the ditch. OH! What is this? Smells strange.....! Like a rotten fish. But I am hungry.....! If I want to live on my own I will have to eat what I get.
Eeew....gulp, that was not so good. I'm not feeling so good all a sudden either. I think I will lay down right here on the curb for a while and wait till my tummy quits hurting. I don't feel like such a hero now, maybe my mom will find me, or even an OWNER!
HEY, what is that? Someone is picking me up......wait a minute!
Get your hands away from me! Sniff, sniff...., it smells like food...good food...and like children. I like children! Oh, my tummy hurts, I really don't care, take me if you will, whoever you are.

This is how I found my new home, or shall I say it found me? Anyway, the lady who found me on the side of the street tried everything possible to find out where I came from.
I heard her call the shelters, the veterinarian and even town hall and the police. But no luck, nobody was looking for me.
I know they didn't want to keep me. There was already a dog, and cats, and 3 kids. The man kept saying,
"This is going to be a BIG dog, look at his feet!" What's wrong with my feet?
Oh well, right then I couldn't have cared, they had good food for me, a warm place to sleep and medicine for my tummy. I decided to wait and see what the next few days would bring.

CHAPTER 2

GETTING AQUAINTED

Well, it is the beginning of October and here I am, still with the folks who picked my up on the road between two little towns. I have gotten over my rotten stomach. It took several visits to the veterinarian, a kind man I might say. He diagnosed a rotten stomach (as if I didn't know) from some spoiled stuff I had picked up on the side of the road. He had some pills which I had to get stuffed down my throat several times a day. Yikes, that is no fun.
All dogs out there be warned, when the people you live with start talking really silly stuff and come towards you with a giant smile and something small hidden in the hand. It is a sure sign they are up to no good and it is time to run!
I know they want to keep me now, the children take me outside so I can play and do my business. The lady has given me a name. It is nothing like what I expected. My name should be Hero or Dragon Fighter, something heroic! But no, she had to call me BUDDY. What does a Buddy do anyhow? I will have to explore, and try to find out. Afterall, a dog should live up to his name!
My mouth feels funny right now. They say I am growing new teeth. Makes it sound like I am the gardener. I must be getting something because my mouth feels sore. And I am slobbering badly. This morning one of the children called me Sharky. She told everyone I have two rows of teeth. I wonder what a Sharky does? Maybe that is a suitable name?
They brought home a cloth toy with knots in the ends for me to play with and chew on. It is fun. You should try it! The best trick about it is, that when you bring it to them, they have this instinct to throw it away so you can go and run after it. I like to pretend it is a dangerous monster. After I capture it we fight and I shake it until it stops moving!
A cat lives here, too! His name is Santos and he is a great companion. He knows how to make a coffee mug spill milk onto the floor, so it is easy for both of us to lick it up. I like that a lot. Santos is my friend.
I am sure the people in this house are glad we are here and take such good care of their leftovers. They must be real proud to have us.

As the weeks go by I grow a lot and gain some weight, I learn to sit and to come running when they whistle, I have tought them to give out GOODIES after a whistle, and now I know that the man's shoes are not ment to be eaten. I like it here and since they believe they are my OWNER now, I will stay.

CHAPTER 3

MERRY CHRISTMAS

December 1995!! I am a part of the family for sure now. They are so crazy about me. I have a collar with a shiny tag and another tag with my name and phone number on it, just in case I meet a beautiful lady dog, so I can give her my number. Isn't that nice?
This morning, when we got up the girl Angie ( she is the oldest daughter of Mama ) let me outside. You wouldn't believe what I saw. Everything was covered with white fluffy looking stuff.
When I sniffed it to get a scent, a horrible monster grabbed be by my legs and pulled me down the stairs! Naturally, I started fighting and growling for Angie's life, believe me I wasn't thinking about myself for a minute! And what do I get? I must have scared the monster away for good because nothing moved inside the white stuff exept my tail, but when I looked up I saw the family at the top af the stairs laughing!!! Boy, am I glad someone got amusement out of the scare. They just don't know how lucky they are to have me!
Guess what! Dad, the only male in the family, other than me, brought home a tree today. Into the house! I was so happy....my own sanitation!
What? NO???? What is that supposed to mean? It is not for me? What are they doing now? Decorating, they call it. Hmm. I do like that much. Here, let me help!

As I thought, the helping part didn't go to well either. First of all I would like to warn every dog in the world that the shiny stuff they call tinsel gives you a heck of a belly ache and makes for some embarrassing moments when it is trying to come through the "natural channels".
Also popcorn decorations are not for the taking. The humans wrap the stuff around the tree in a sneaky way so, when you try to steal just one tiny bit, the whole tree falls over, right on top of you. I learned my lesson!
One good thing though - on Christmas Eve they get all mushy and sweet and can't resist handing down some of the delicious food they usually eat themselves.

CHAPTER 4

HEARDING SHEEP

Ah, well, time stops for nobody and a dog has to learn new tricks. Especially the young dog - which I am! So ambitious animal that I am and very observant, lately my people have been taking me along on their walks around the area.
Naturally I am helping out by marking the territory, since it is much easier and quicker for me to do. They are always bundled up in layers of clothing. I know, they have no fur, but still, how uncomfortable they must be. And their speed is pathetic. I have been trying to give them lots of exercise by pretending not to hear them calling my name, not the noble way, indeed, but what is a dog to do?
They don't get it. They should take off those rags and just run with me. There is nothing more satisfying then the wind around the nose and the flapping of my ears. Granted, their ears could use improvement as well, but most of them have quite a protruding nose. Which brings me back to my subject at hand. Or shall I say paws? See the humans have outside animals living with them as well as us indoor pets. The whooly things with the black legs and the curled horns are called sheep. Get this! Every now and then, those sheep need to come in for an inspection and a haircut. Exept, they have very small brains and don't seem to understand the routine as well as I do by now.
It goes something like this:
Sheep stand around the pasture eating grass - human comes in with bucket - human starts banging bucket - sheep pick up heads and start to make an awful noise - human walks with bucket to shed - sheep follow human - human puts food from bucket into feeders - sheep crowd into shed around feeder and begin to nibble - human "sneaks" outside to close the door - some of the sheep are brainy enough to get the point and run back outside, over the humans' body if nessessary.........
After watching this incedibly dull procedure, I decided to take matters in my own paws and dared to sneak out one night to teach those grass eaters a lesson or two!
Sure enough I found them standing around in little groups as usual and as soon as I found an opening in the fence, that was big enough for me to get through, I charged at the first one and hollered at the top of my voice for it to give up and surrender. Well, it proved not to be so easy. Obviously they had no idea who they where dealing with. Instead of following my commands, they decided to baaah their little brains out and ran away from me in a huge bulk. I was outnumbered by far, at least 12 of those beasts ran away in panic, crashing into fence posts and into each other.
Oops, that was their mistake! Now I knew how to get them! I waited patiently for one of them to stumble over another one!
Snap! I had it! Yeah!!!! I sunk my teeth into the whooly butt! Not a pleasant taste by the way. I was very careful to avoid my teeth to go to deep. But, oh, what joy! The silly animal immediately quit struggling and rolled over on its side.
But now what? I succeeded in stopping the thing, but how would I get it into the shed?
At this moment my humans must have heard the ruckus and came running, arms flailing, yelling out loud! Oh my! They where so proud of me. They spoke in tongues,screaming joyfull words like "down", " drop it" and "oh no"! They grabbed the sheep and brought it into the barn, which was the signal for me to go get the next critter!!!!
With a lot of screaming their praise at me and another 45 minutes of breath taking work we managed to get every single one of those sheep into the barn, without a single one ever coming back out! Now that is what I call team work!

That night we all slept very well. The last thing I heard them talk about before sinking into a wonderful sheep filled dream was something called "obediance training" and it had something to do with my name. A special treat for me maybe, since I am their hero now? See, they should have called me Hero!

CHAPTER 5

OBEDIENCE TRAINING

See, I told you so! They made the obedience training treat true. I heard them talking about it all the time! Aaaaand .... always in connection with my name! Yessiree!
Then one day I got to go! It was quite a long ride in the car. That in itself is a great honor to me. I get to sit next to mom and look out the window. Sometimes I lay down and lay my head on her knee, she really goes for that, I can tell by the soft way in which she talks to me then. Not that I know what on earth she is talking about. You know, her being a woman and all and human, too!
So, anyway, we got to that place and I knew immediately, that this was it, by the smells of all the other dogs, and as we drove into the parking lot I could see them all lined up waiting for their treats. Looked like there are many good brothers and sisters out there doing a terrific job, herding sheep and such. So when mom put the leash on me I just knew she wanted me to show her the way and I pulled with all my strength to make her real proud! All the other dogs thought I was outstanding, because when they saw my efforts they started to cheer like nothing you have ever heard before. Wow, it was like heaven!
We lined up just like everyone else and I made friends with the dog in front of me and the one behind me. We were all led into a large fenced in area. There I saw all kinds of wooden walls and sticks and several people who walked around, personally greeting every hero. You should have seen some of those dogs. Some where huge old fuzzy things and others barely as big as my head. Personally I thought it a little of an over reaction when the dachshund tried to advance towards the Doberman girl and everybody started yelling and clapping and waving their hands. She was certainly interested in the little guy. I have to say, she smelled pretty appealing to me, too.
But to make a long story even longer, I have to complain a bit right about now. See, the training is in no way a reward for heroic deeds, but merely a schooling for the advanced dog. Once you prove to be of a heroic nature, your people assume you can do even more wonderful tricks and they begin teaching you! So, my dear dog readers, beware of being overly assertive and never, never show them that you know exactly what they expect, unless you don't care for individuality. Always make sure your human thinks you just didn't understand or overhear a command, before you do as you please. It gives them reason to take you back to obedience class, where you can meet all kinds of cool friends and get plenty of attention.

Remains to remark that herding sheep is done only after so called commands and people have nasty tricks up their sleeves for making you stay in a certain spot even if you would rather inspect the fence and what is on the other side of it. Oh, and one last thing! If you ever get to go to obedience training, make sure you always work better with the trainer, that way they blame it on your human if you fail, teehee!

Hints and Vocabulary got sent to my by e-mail. In case you know who the author is please let me know. I would love to pay credit for this worthy information.

© 1997 StormWilow@aol.com