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WELCOME TO OUR JOKE PAGE!!!! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
My first time..... THE SKY WAS DARK, THE MOON WAS HIGH, ALL ALONE, JUST HER AND I. HER HAIR SO SOFT, HER EYES SO BLUE, I KNEW JUST WHAT SHE WANTED TO DO. HER SKIN SO SOFT, HER LEGS SO FINE, I RAN MY FINGERS DOWN HER SPINE. I DIDNT KNOW HOW, BUT I TRIED MY BEST, TO PLACE MY HAND UPON HER BREAST. I REMEMBER MY FEAR, MY FAST BEATING HEART, BUT SLOWLY SHE SPREAD HER LEGS APART. AND WHEN SHE DID, I FELT NO SHAME, ALL AT ONCE THE WHITE STUFF CAME. AT LAST IT'S FINISHED, IT'S ALL OVER NOW, THE VERY FIRST TIME, THAT I MILKED A COW...... | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
A BOY WAS BORN WITH ONLY A HEAD.... ONE NIGHT HE WENT TO BED, AND WISHED TO WAKE UP WITH A BODY. WELL, THE NEXT MORNING, HE WOKE UP TO DISCOVER THAT HIS WISH HAD COME TRUE....HE THOUGHT " WOW...THIS IS AWESOME...I MAY HAVE THE CHANCE TO BE A NORMAL BOY SOMEDAY IF THIS KEEPS UP." SO THAT NIGHT, HE WENT TO BED, AND WISHED TO WAKE UP WITH ARMS, LEGS, HANDS, AND FEET. WELL THE NEXT MORNING, SURE ENOUGH, HE DID... HE WANTED TO TEST OUT HIS NEW BODY, SO HE RAN AS FAST AS HE COULD OUTSIDE. WHEN HE GOT OUTSIDE, A BUS HIT HIM, AND KILLED HIM............. THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS: QUIT WHILE YOU'RE A-HEAD!!! |
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A ROPE WALKS INTO A BAR, AND THE BARTENDER SAID "SORRY MAC, WE DON'T SERVE ROPES HERE..." SO THE ROPE LEFT, FEELING SAD... HE HAD, HAD A BAD DAY, AND REALLY WANTED A DRINK BADLY. SO HE DECIDED TO PULL A FAST ONE ON THE BARTENDER...HE WENT UP THE STREET A LITTLE WAYS, AND TIED HIMSELF IN A KNOT. THEN HE UNRAVELD THE END OF HIS ROPE. HE TURNED AROUND, AND WALKED BACK INTO THE BAR....THE BARTENDER SAID " ARE YOU A ROPE MAC? I TOLD YOU ALREADY I DON'T SERVE ROPES HERE, SO IF YOU ARE A ROPE, YOU'D BETTER LEAVE QUIETLY." THE ROPE TURNED TO HIM AND SAID " NO SIR, I AM A-FRAID K-NOT."!!!!! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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What do you call a blonde skeleton under the bed??? Last years Hide and Go Seek Champion! |
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Why did the blonde jump over the GLASS WALL??? to see what was on the other side... |
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Down in Boston, there is a bar that has a mirror that will swallow you up if you lie to it... One day, a brunette, walks into the bar and she goes up to the mirror. She looks at her reflection in the mirror, and says " I think I am the most beautiful woman in the world." the mirror swallowed her up. Then a redhead walks into the bar, walks straight up to the mirror, looks at her reflection, and says "I think I am the most sexy woman in the world." well the mirror swallows her up too. Then later on, a blonde walks into that same bar. She went straight up to the mirror, looked at her reflection, and says "I think...." and the mirror swallowed her up... |
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THERE WERE TWO BLONDES WALKING IN A FOREST ONE DAY. THEY CAME UPON A SET OF TRACKS. ONE BLONDE SAYS: "OH, WOW, LOOK, LIKE, THESE BEAR TRACKS ARE LIKE, AWESOME." THE OTHER BLONDE SAYS: "NO, LIKE, I THINK THESE ARE DEER TRACKS, OR SOMETHING." THEY WERE STILL ARGUING ABOUT IT WHEN THE TRAIN HIT THEM......... | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
SO THERE WERE TWO BLONDES DRIVING DOWN A ROAD. AS THEY PASSED BY A FIELD, THEY NOTICED A BLONDE ROWING A BOAT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT. THE PASSENGER TURNS TO THE DRIVER AND SAYS: "IT'S BLONDES LIKE THAT, THAT GIVE US BLONDES A BAD NAME." THEN THE DRIVER SAYS: "I AGREE, AND IF I COULD SWIM, I'D SWIM OUT THERE, AND KICK HER BUTT!!!!" | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were all going to be executed. The brunette went before the firing squad first. The capitan yells "READY, AIM..." and then the brunette yells "EARTHQUAKE". The firing squad all looked around to see what was going on, and the brunette escaped.. The redhead was up next. The capitan yells "READY, AIM..." The redhead yells "TORNADO" and escapes. Then the blonde went up...and now she has the idea on how to escape this mess. So the capitan yells "READY, AIM..." and the blonde yells "FIRE!!!" | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
DO YOU HAVE ANY JOKES THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE POSTED ON THIS PAGE??? CLICK HERE TO EMAIL THEM TO US, AND WE WILL BE MORE THEN HAPPY TO PUT THEM UP ON THIS PAGE FOR YOU....HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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CLICK HERE TO VIEW PRESIDENT JOKES...(PG-13) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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