"Violence solves everything, if it doesn't then you aren't using enough"
-My Current Favorite, Author Unknown to me

"`My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'"
Douglas Adams

"There was a point to this story, but it has temporarily escaped the chronicler's mind."
Douglas Adams

"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair."
Douglas Adams

"`If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.'"

"Humans think they are smarter than dolphins because we build cars and buildings and start wars etc...and all that dolphins do is swim in the water, eat fish and play around. Dolphins believe that they are smarter for exactly the same reasons."

Infinite: Bigger than the biggest thing ever and then some. Much bigger than that in fact, really amazingly immense, a totally stunning size, real "wow, that's big," time. Infinity is just so big that, by comparison, bigness itself looks really titchy. Gigantic multiplied by colossal multiplied by staggeringly huge is the sort of concept we're trying to get across here.

It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there most be a finite number of inhabited worlds. And finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any person you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination.

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
Mark Twain

Obscurity and a competence. That is the life that is best worth living.
Mark Twain

"`If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.'"

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
Albert Einstein

"Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch-slap the motherfucker upside the head..."
Unknown

"I enjoy watching buff men in tights rolling around on a mat"
David Ho

"Do you wanna go to the morgue"
Whalen Rozelle

"What the hell?"
Adam Riff

" I dont like you, I love you man! "
Becky Faustine

"I make people like me look bad"
Erijn Wjaer

"I want to say something **** wait no i didn't say that"
Michael Herbst

"Bitch"
Kevin Ning

"You are so full of shit, and this is coming from your alter ego."
Aaron Garman